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How do I move beyond my obsession?

Tagged as: Breaking up, The ex-factor<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (7 July 2010) 2 Answers - (Newest, 7 July 2010)
A age 36-40, anonymous writes:

I'm very emotionally hurt, I can easily cry if I think too much about him, or about our situation... We meet two years ago, from the beginning I've seen in him something special and in the same time a lot of bad feeling, we never had a commitment or an official relationship. We spent a lot of time together, I know his entire friend, and they think that I'm his friend too, but I hate all that lie, because we seem to be friends with benefits. He knows about my feelings, but he doesn't want to have a relation because he want freedom or who knows what. I tried to live him like 7 times maybe, telling him to not call me or text me, to forget about my existence... he understand his mistakes and some of the times he was apologizing and telling that is all his fault, and we were back together again in our unexcitable relation...This situations is getting worse and worse because I notice that he is seeing another girls, even text them in front of me, not even care that I feel horrible because of that. I don't understand who am I in his eyes? Why I keep care about him? I understand that I'm obsessed, but it hurts me a lot not seeing him or being with him for a long time. The worse is that I understand what I have to do, is to forget about him and just start a new page in my life, but it impossible, we have so many beautiful moments, crazy moments, he helped me a lot with many problems. I go to church, and I feel very guilty in front of the God, because of my relation. I pray for his changing every day, but he is getting worse and worse. He is drinking a lot and has big gambling addiction. Even if he is doing all that, he is not that bad in my eyes, maybe I’m getting crazy? I'm here in this site, because I was trying to find some anonymous center for obsessed people, I feel like I need help from a specialist, or people that had the same problem.

View related questions: friend with benefits, gambling, my ex, text

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A reader, anonymous, writes (7 July 2010):

I too have dealt heavily with obsession - especially with men who treat me like garbage, my wish for you is to go and get help now, you are so young and if you continue this relationship and it ends (which it will, he doesnt want you) you will jump into another emotionally abusive one again - dont end up jaded and bitter please!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (7 July 2010):

I too have been going through your feelings everyday - for some reason we have such low opinions of ourselves and it is sooo hard to pull ourselves up. But if we dont everyday we die a little more inside - stop this relationship and go talk to a counsellor or someone from a woman's shelter - please!!! I would rather be beaten than to be emotionally shit on day after day....

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