A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have been attracted to this guy who takes my sons football class , I am married and in the process of separating , when i am around this guy I feel awkward and feel my heart pounding , I can never really look at him as Im scared the eye contact will intensify things . He is very friendly to my son , Im not sure if I am imagining it but he seems to take extra interest in my son maybe as a way of getting to me . He knows i am married , so is probably thinking he cannot pursue anything and i have no idea whether he is single or not, i suspect that he is bit younger than me but that is not an issue. My son has recently stopped the class and we gave this guy a thank you card , i was hoping that this would be a subtle way of telling him i like him , trouble is ,he has no way of contacting me , what should i do , I really need him to know how i am feeling. Reply to this Question |
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 November 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell i started the classes again , and decided to try and talk to him on his own , nothing heavy , just a chat - I thought i must have an excuse to go back to the hall where the class was held , so i thought ill say i left my mobile phone behind . So went after the last class of the day , hid my phone up my sleeve and went in and said ' did i leave my phone behind ?' and went straight to the place where my bag had been during the class , only problem being that he may have realised that it was a lie , as surely he would have noticed something on the floor , unless other bags had been placed there during the next class , which could have been possible. Anyway , i pretended to pick up my phone and said ' got half way home and realised i didnt have it ' and he didnt say anything about that , as if he had bought the story , I then talked to him really casual , just about if he played football much and he happily told me what he had done playing wise so far - really nice little chat , no hint of how i like him or anything . Im just worried that he knew i was having him on about the phone and now thinks im very strange , to have concocted such a story , but it was all i could think of at the time .Im really not sure how to play it , when i see him next week , don't want him to think im crazy ! Should i try and explain myself or just see if he says anything or acts weird , thanks for any input...
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 October 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for all the responses , it is difficult as i dont mix in the same social circles as him and i dont even know his surname or where he lives, but i know where he works and he would be on his own after the classes, so i could drop in to see him then. As for starting the class again , i think is not a great idea because of professional ethics etc on his part , he has to remain professional and with my son around , we would just chat about him and not us !! In the classes , I have felt awkward around him and i have been playing it cool , but he did laugh at a joke i made I really want to play it cool and not look like an idiot , would turning up at his work be weird ? When we gave him the thank you card , he said to my son (who is 2 by the way) oh we will have to 'keep in touch' he said this looking at him and not me , so what could he of meant by that ? I really dont think anything will happen unless i instigate it , how can i do that and play it cool though ? thanks for any advise , i hope im not imagining all this and if he has a girlfriend i dont want to wreck anything for him.
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2009): Try to start the class again.. Find out if you can see him again somewhere he hangs out. Act available. Make eye contact smile ask him to go for a coffee or a run or something. Check out his body langauge towards you. Let him know you are sinlge and ready in a casual way, play it easy breezy. Make sure your ring is off, maybe tell your son to say in front of him Mom do you have a date tonight.
dont be too nervous, life is short just try something. Flirt and dress cute, mimic his movements, where perfume etc, look hot. Feel him out first to see what page hes on, if hes hot he may have a gf or something. He should do the hunting not you but at least he should know you are free and open to dating, remember your on his level.
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionMy marriage has been dead for a while now , so im not sure this would be a rebound , but im aware that he could think so , which is why i want to be casual about it . Would it seem desperate or weird to just turn up to see him , how would i play it . There is a possibility that we may start the classes again - i feel so nrevous and awkward around him ,its so hard to catch his eye, how can i flirt with him but not seem too in your face . I need to find out if he is interested , but chances are he thinks im married and out of bounds , thanks would appreciate your advice.
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2009): He would just be a rebound guy are you ready to date. He knows you are separated and going through a rough/bad time so men sometimes dont want the drama. Is he sinlge or has a wife or girlfrined. If he liked you he would come up to you and ask you out if you looked available and if he was interested enough. Is the cemisrtty there. You must make eye contact, smile, laugh and make it seem like you have no problems. Give him good body langauge and go see him again with your son if possible and ask him if hes free one day to hang out. But are you really ready for it??? If so then go for it, life is short you have nothing to lose. If you dont so something you will just be obsessed over it.
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male
reader, CaringGuy + ♥, writes (23 October 2009):
Don't be sure of your feelings yet, be very careful. You've jsut separated from your husband, so you really need to give yourself time to come to terms with it all. Take it slow and focus on yourself, rather than trying to date anyone just yet. You don't want to go from one relationship into another without really giving yourself some time to focus your life again.
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