A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi everyone I was just wondering how people in a similar situation deal with this I have a son who is 4 later this year.I had him when I was 22.My partner left me when I told him I was pregnant but I look very young for my age even though I am 26 I get people tutting and calling me names nasty insulting names when I walk by with my son How do I deal with this as its really hurtful thank you :) Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Honeypie  + ♥, writes (22 June 2012):
 Stop caring what people think. If they are people that otherwise MATTERS in your life, set them straight as to how hurtful it is.
It's not like you can help looking young (or should try not to look young). If anyone have a problem with your looks, then you know what.. it's THEIR problem.
One of my neighbors look like a 14 year old, she is 24 and the mother of 2. From what I have seen a good mother at that. Do I judge her on her looks? Not at all. She seems like a decent person.
Be who you are, be proud of what you have accomplished on your own.
**hugs**
JUST remember you can not fix stupid!
A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (22 June 2012):
 Have a card made up that says: "Due to repeated insults and comments on my appearance, I have resorted to having this card printed. I had my child at age 22. I am not a teen mum. I appear to be younger than I actually am. If people like you would stop and think about the effect their words have on others, this world would be a much better place to live. I wish you well, and hope this may help you understand that words are hurtful. Teen mums shouldn't be subjected to harassment either, for that matter. "Keep your words soft and sweet."
Thank you."
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 June 2012): I'm 27 but look around 16 and I'm really glad I don't want kids, because the idea that people would think I'm a dumb knocked-up teenager horrifies me. Unfortunately there is no cure for looking much younger, time will correct it I guess. People who don't have this problem don't seem able to understand it and think it is a positive thing to look so much younger. Ugh!
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (22 June 2012):
 I'm not sure why in the world you care what strangers think at all... but to be honest it's their loss and their own ignorance...
in this day and age of older women having babies, etc I've learned not to make any assumptions at all about who the baby actually belongs too...
great story:
my then boyfriend and I took a neighbor's child to the zoo. the adults had dark hair and this child was as ginger as they come... I was maybe 20 and the child about 5.... she was riding on my boyfriend's shoulders and folks were saying how cute she was and someone said "where does she get her red hair from" and I smiled and said "her father" which was true... and we kept going...well this was about 1980 so it was pretty scandalous then to have a child that age and be with a different man... their jaws dropped they were speechless and we laughed and kept walking.
I find that humor usually diffuses most situations... so if they SAY something to you directly you could say... "oh i'm 12 I look old for my age and I stole the child from someone's porch" otherwise I'd IGNORE them... they aren't hurting you... just themselves with their narrow views.
enjoy looking young, i had that and at 26 with two kids folks often thought I was the baby sitter... after 40 I looked my age and now at 52 I look every inch of the grandma that I wanna be...
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A
female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (22 June 2012):
 If people tutt or call you names then I wouls simply stop them in the street and say 'excuse me, have you got something to say to my face? I am 26 if you must know, and simply fortunate that I look so young for my age. I would appreciate it if you kept your insults to yourself and think before you judge people next time".
That will make them feel very embarrassed and they will apologize. But then again this is hassle for you, and perhaps you dont have the time to stop and correct everyone who is rude to you. In that case, simply ignore them and know that you are a better person than they are.
If you learn not to care what people think then their insults wont matter, after all they are simply ignorant, rudge, judgemental people who have no idea what they are talking about. They dont affect your life, they dont affect how much you love your child so forget about them, they are not important to you. If we cared what all the horrible people in the world thought about us then we would never leave the house!
Keep your head held high, these people are pathetic and have nothing better to do with their lives than to be rude and judge complete strangers. If you do stop someone on the street and correct them then good for you (I would love to see the look on their face when you tell them you are 26!) but if you dont want to do that then simply ignore them and tell yourself that you are the better person and they are just nasty, pathetic little people who havent got a clue.
I hope this helps and good luck!
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A
female
reader, curious1987  +, writes (22 June 2012):
 I know exactly how u feel !!! ( i dont have kids) but im 25 and look round 15. When i babysit my sisters kids, i always gey ppl looking and whispering. but i just stare straight back at them , and say "they say having kids age u, but i guess im lucky i still look 26" . This way they will gt embarrased ajd know that ur 26 at same time. Good luck n let me know if it works :-) xx
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