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How do I get over a guy who is dating my friend? Any advice is appreciated.

Tagged as: Dating<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (23 January 2007) 2 Answers - (Newest, 4 February 2007)
A age 30-35, * writes:

Dear Anyone, I really need help. I've been in love with this guy for almost 5 months now, he fills every thought I have... 2 months or so ago, I told him this (after a failed attempt at explaining how I felt) and he said he like me as a mate. since then he has began seeing my friend, (this was fine by me, however a lot of stuff of happened and basically, me and friend had a fall out because she stabbed me in the back over this boy)they have been seeing each other for almost 2 months but never act like they are seeing each other... I constantly flirt with boys and he flirts back, we are closer now then ever before... but I want more. I am in love with him I am sure... My friend wasn't even sure she wanted to go out with him anymore last week, but I helped her work through the problem and now they're doing okay...(they still don't act like they're seeing each other but...)

I'm 16 and deperate for advice, I know I should try to get over him but I can't!!! I want him so much, Please help, I split up with my boyfriend cause I love this boy...

View related questions: flirt, split up

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A reader, anonymous, writes (4 February 2007):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Firstly I wanna thank my anonymous helper. Your advice was gladly accepted.

Secondly, here's a quick update on my situation:

Me and him are so close now, we tell each other everything, and I mean everything, (well, I haven't told him I still have feelings for him) he wanted to split with his girlfriend and he talked to me about the reasons why and told me everything, trusting me with secrets no-one else knows... and after a long talk with him, he did split with my "friend" (although we are speaking and do have a laugh I still feel I can't trust her). I was in the middle of this split, because I wanted to help him, I could see he wasn't happy and after he talked to me and told me everything I found out how unhappy he was. But I didn't tell him to split with her, I tried to make it work out again, like I did when she came to me saying she wasn't happy but, he really was unhappy.

He split with her for several reason, one being he like this other girl, but she has a boyfriend. She did say she would split with him and she and my friend kissed but she hasn't and he's really upset, (he's says he's over it but...)

Recently, me and him seem to be flirting a lot more as well, getting along really really well, So I don't want to risk it now, He's like my big brother, and looks after me no matter whats wrong, I can go to him for anything, and I mean anything. I willing to wait for as long as it takes for one of our feeling to change ( hopefully, it'll be his) because like my anonymous helper said, I'm only 16 right?

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (24 January 2007):

There is no good news here. save that your young. Your also the most forgiving person I have ever heard from. Your friend betraid you by taking the guy you two had to have talked about how much you liked him, he went with her knowing how you felt. any relationship while your young is fleeting. We are by no means mature enough as adults for this, just read any of the other posts and you'll see what I mean. You may benifit form a bit of patience, sit back and watch. he went with her so you are NOT first on his list and he's looking for girls not relationships. you deserve better. Sorry for the downer but you are better off seeking some personal time to get over him alone and so that you can function in any relationships you may have in the future. you have all the time in the world, and take it from me he'll tear your heart out, but that happens from time to to time no changing that, the coice is yours in the end, pros and cons kid, you are just 16 and there is plenty of time. Good luck

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