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How do I approach her about having an 'exclusive' relationship?

Tagged as: Dating, Gay relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (10 November 2009) 1 Answers - (Newest, 10 November 2009)
A female United Kingdom age 36-40, anonymous writes:

I am at my wits end!

I'm gay... not that it really matters for my query!

I met the most amazing girl online just over two months ago .... we've talked on MSN and occasionally the phone nearly every single night, we also send each other a few texts each day.

We've met up twice, she stayed at mine the first time, and I stayed at hers the second time... we'd meet up more but we both have busy jobs and live about 2 hours apart. Both times we shared a bed and cuddled all night long.

First and foremost we're very close friends, and neither of us want to spoil this. After we first met up, she quite bluntly said she wasn't ready for a relationship (having not long split with her ex), I got a bit upset and took it to meant she didn't want anything to happend between us.

The second time we met up, I didn't realise it at the time but I had swine flu, and was quite ill, so nothing happened, and I probably came across as kind of off with her.

We haven't taked about the potential of 'us' since just after the first meet up, and I have no idea what is going on.

I'm very aware if she wants anything to happen she'll be wanting to take it slow, I do too, I'm aware we have something quite special and don't want to crap it up!

I need to know how to approach the subject without making her run a mile, or ruining our very special friendship!

Please help! xx

View related questions: her ex, msn, text

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A female reader, dazey New Zealand +, writes (10 November 2009):

I think you should see each other a bit more and then decide. You might find the subject comes up naturally in face to face conversation or when you're hanging out together. It sounds like you rely on MSN and text, both of which can be a bit contrived for such matters.

If you're realy happy taking it slow then do. Just have a few meets and see what happens.

I might be odd, but for me, exclusivity is not as important in the early stages but I understand it does get to that point eventually, although I'm not sure if it sounds like you two have reached that point yet.

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