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How did he get Chlamydia?

Tagged as: Health, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (21 September 2011) 8 Answers - (Newest, 30 September 2011)
A female United Kingdom age 41-50, *ella011 writes:

I have been with my partner for over 2 years, we have had a few tough weeks. he has been depressed as he has lost his job and feels a failure, which of course I tell him he is not. He has been a bit agitated for a few weeks,today he rang me and told me he has been tested positive for chylmida, I am devistated and disgusted he swears to me that he has only been with me since we got together, and I have only been with him. He is really upset that he thinks he has given this to me, I am being tested tomorrow.How can I get through this, I cant believe this has happened. I just dont know what to believe. Can anyone please give me some advice.

View related questions: depressed, lost his job

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A female reader, tennisstar88 United States +, writes (30 September 2011):

tennisstar88 agony auntOh course he's going to tell you he got it from his previous partner!!! He's NOT going to admit he cheated!!

What did he say when you asked why he randomly got tested when you two have been together for 2 years? You did ask him that, didn't you?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (29 September 2011):

Hun, he cheated. The proof is the STD.

Why did he decide to get tested in the first place. Perhaps he suspected himself?

I know u love him. And u want to believe him and want to think of "excuses" but this is what it is.

LoveGirl

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A female reader, bella011 United Kingdom +, writes (29 September 2011):

bella011 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

I have got my results back and i have tested positive, he is gutted and cant even look at me, he swears he has not cheated and he must have got it from his previous partner, i know i have not cheated, i love him so much, could this be what has happened. We have been together for over 2 years.

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A male reader, CaringGuy United Kingdom +, writes (22 September 2011):

He cheated. That's why he suddenly got tested - there was no need for him to suddenly get tested since you've been together for 2 years.

Also, it would also tie in with his recent attitude. The loss of job, the feeling of failure, the depression. All signs that he either cheated, or signs that led him to cheat.

Sorry about this. But I don't see why he'd suddenly get tested for an STD, and I think with the recent problems you've been having it probably seals the deal. The most important thing you can do is get tested yourself quickly. Then you can decide whether you believe that he cheated and carry on, or (like I think), that you should end it and move on.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (22 September 2011):

Well the Bupa website says it IS possible to have it without knowing for months/years if you have no symptoms.

Have you slept with anyone BEFORE him? Because you could even have been the carrier and had it first, and given it to him (if you didn't get tested before you slept together?)

Ask at the clinic, they will be able to answer your worries. x

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A female reader, Ciar Canada + , writes (22 September 2011):

Ciar agony auntI'm with tennistar on this. 100%.

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A female reader, tennisstar88 United States +, writes (22 September 2011):

tennisstar88 agony auntChlamydia is known as a "silent" disease because the majority of infected people have no symptoms. If symptoms do occur, they usually appear within 1 to 3 weeks after exposure.

I pulled that little snippet from this link: http://www.cdc.gov/std/chlamydia/stdfact-chlamydia.htm

This STD doesn't lay dormant for 2 years. I'm questioning why he out of the blue decided to go get tested for STDs when he swears he's been with you for the past 2yrs. There would be no need to.

I put my $ on he cheated, started showing symptoms and had to get tested..then had to tell you in case you have it.

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A female reader, person12345 United States +, writes (22 September 2011):

person12345 agony auntIt's possible to catch without cheating. He could have been asymptomatic and had it from a previous partner, he could catch it from somehow getting fecal matter near the tip of his penis, there are a couple ways to get it. I'm curious as to why he suddenly decided to get tested.

If there were no signs that he cheated and you trust him, it's always possible he was faithful.

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