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How can you mend a broken heart?

Tagged as: Breaking up, Long distance<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (22 March 2011) 4 Answers - (Newest, 2 April 2011)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

How do you mend a broken heart?

I know this is probably one of the most common questions but i'm heartbroken and some days im fine, other days I cant seem to pull it together.

My ex and I were together for 2 n a half years, long distance. We split up roughly 10 months ago and for months he asked for me back but i couldnt trust him anymore. Over christmas i couldnt stop thinking about him and missed him so much, so i got in contact with him. However he turned around and said hes with someone else now and having a baby. It hit me like a tonne of bricks.

It was hard enough missing him, but now theres no chance of reconciling anything and everyone tells me to move on.. But to all the people reading this who have suffered a broken heart.. Thats easier said than done.

I just wanna be happy and move on without comparing men to him or thinking about him. How do you mend a broken heart?

View related questions: christmas, heartbroken, long distance, move on, split up

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (2 April 2011):

I have the same problem love I'm from the UK and she lives in the US. She only talks two me when it suites her. I loved her but she has took my love for granted. I suggest u block him on Facebook he only wants two mess with ur head becuz he knows u love him move on. Find someone who loves u and treats u with respect that's what I'm going two do. I wish u good luck love stay strong and let somebody come two u don't chase anyone let them do the chasing.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2011):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Thankyou for all your advice. I've just got a new job and things have started looking up for me so I felt I was doing good and moving on with my life. However I woke up this morning to a 'poke' on facebook from him and then a few hrs later he had messaged me saying 'hey babe, how are you? I was just thinking about you'

This really doesn't help! I looked at the time of the message and it was mid afternoon his time, so I doubt he was drunk. I was doing so well, but this has knocked me back. I haven't answered him coz I want the ball to be in my court so to speak, but at the same time I want to ask why he's thinking about me when he shot me down a few months ago saying he's settling down!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (22 March 2011):

Its the worst feeling in the world. There is no simple answer to this but 'time'. Sometimes you feel ok and other days you dont even want to get out of bed. Everyone will tell you to keep busy and take up new interests but that is the best thing to do. You have to remember you broke up for a reason and you just were'nt meant to be together. There is someone out there for you and that guy will come along and you will feel loved again.

Go out with friends, do the things that you didnt have time for before. Dont waste anymore time on this guy, he has obviously moved on and when the time is right you will too. Good luck and stay positive.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (22 March 2011):

At least you can see the door is totally closed, that is a plus in a way, as any lingering thoughts you had that there was a chance are now gone. You may not see it as a plus, but it means you can face this square on. It's over and although it is very painful you can only look forward. Accept that a part of you will always have feelings for him and think positively. Be selfish, do things you enjoy, pamper yourself. Be busy, don't allow yourself too much time to dwell on negative thoughts. Get a new hair cut, treat yourselves to some new clothes - it will give you a boost. You will get over this. Give yourself time, the pain will gradually go. You will be happy again.

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