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How can it be love if they need to be drunk to have sex?

Tagged as: Health, Sex, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (2 July 2010) 11 Answers - (Newest, 2 July 2010)
A female United States age 41-50, anonymous writes:

Is someone really in love with you when the only time they have sex with you is when they are drunk?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (2 July 2010):

No

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A female reader, Elydiese United Kingdom +, writes (2 July 2010):

No

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A female reader, SoftlyCaress  +, writes (2 July 2010):

SoftlyCaress agony auntI dont think it should be . I am seeing this man that is the same way and I refuse to have sex with him when he is drunk because that is all it is (SEX ) hell a person can get sex anywheres but you cant get love anywheres . I say if that is how he wants it to tell him to go get it somewheres else . that you want Love Not Sex ......It messes up your self esteem as well other things mentally . I say tell him you are not dealing with it anymore if he loves you he will change his ways if he doesnt he needs help .Or doesnt really love you but he Lust you and there is a very big difference . Good Luck .....

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (2 July 2010):

Who knows. Maybe they feel inhibited without alcohol.

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A female reader, kitty-cat=] United States +, writes (2 July 2010):

kitty-cat=] agony auntNo

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A male reader, care4u United Kingdom +, writes (2 July 2010):

care4u agony auntHi,you ask is someone in love with you if he only wants sex when he is drunk. there is a big diffirence between love and lust,so i would say he's not in love with you,as the song goes its all in the kiss and thats very true.If you are both in love with each other,sex will always start off with tender loving kisses,and believe me you will both feel the love and magic coming through the kisses. Keep on searching he's out there some where.

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A male reader, TimmD United States +, writes (2 July 2010):

TimmD agony auntNo.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (2 July 2010):

em i dont think so but was it your first time with this guy? is he your boyfiend? because if he is your boyfriend then he might have felt awkard of bringing it up because he didn't want u to think he was your boyfriend just for that. while with drink he was able to test the waters. were drinking as well because if you were then he might feel bad about he situation because he could think he presured you into it and doesn't know how to bring it up. if he's slighty distancing himself from you it because the guilt is eating him up...

written by neadie winters

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A male reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (2 July 2010):

olderthandirt agony auntNo but it might be better than when they're not. you may never know. Drinking lowers inhibitions. maybe he(or she) is a very inhibited person that's been raised in a limiting invironment.;i.e. made to feel guilty about sexual thoughts or actions. Just a thought, perhaps he/she was made to feel ashamed about his/her body and can only deal with it by eacaping to an alcohol fuzzy world. this may not mean he or she doesn' love you but just has severe limitations with intamacy. Maybe a "shrink' could get to the bottom of the problem. Good Luck. R.

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A female reader, sexyskye United Kingdom +, writes (2 July 2010):

maybe they dont feel confident enough or maybe they are more sexually adventurous when a bit tipsy ,I think get drunk together and then take it upstairs just enjoy yourselves your only young xx

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A female reader, eyeswideopen United States +, writes (2 July 2010):

eyeswideopen agony auntNo

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