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How can I stop my ex from harassing me? He wants me back, yet his actions are distressing me

Tagged as: Breaking up, Crushes, Dating, Teenage, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (13 February 2014) 5 Answers - (Newest, 14 February 2014)
A female United States age 26-29, anonymous writes:

my ex boyfriend wont leave me alone.

ever since he broke up with me, he has been getting into trouble, showing up in all of my classes, and he even asked my best friend out.

we only dated for about a month, and even though i told him that i don't want to have anything to do with him, he follows me around at school all of the time.

now his friends are calling me a slut and a whore, and he has resorted to calling me an "it".

Apparently i am no longer a human being anymore!

i don't know what to do, and today, i spent all 30 minutes of homeroom crying in the bathroom.

He is literally depressing me, and now he "wants me back". my friends are being really supportive, but he still won't stop. please help!!

View related questions: best friend, broke up, my ex

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (14 February 2014):

Honeypie agony auntSuck it up anyways, and TALK to your parents. They will be mad but they will also support and help you, don't you think?

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A male reader, C. Grant Canada +, writes (14 February 2014):

C. Grant agony auntWouldn't it be better to face whatever punishment your parents would give you than to face his continued bullying?

Have you considered speaking to someone at the school? A guidance counsellor or a teacher you have a good relationship with? No school would tolerate that sort of behaviour so once you tell them, they will shut him down. Please don't keep suffering in silence.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2014):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

I would, but I wasn't really supposed to date. I would get in major trouble if I told them. But I really do appreciate your guys' feedback.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (13 February 2014):

Honeypie agony auntYep, talk to your parents and I would consider talking to the school counselor. Him calling you "IT" is a form of bullying and having his friend call you a slut to "support him? Yes, that needs to STOP.

Do not take him back, even if you think that will stop all this drama. It won't.

Since you are 16-17 I get it that involving your parents can seem hard, but DO it, and it might not be a bad idea for YOUR parents to either call or talk face to face to his parents. His actions are NOT OK and needs to stop, I think the best way is to involve his parents. I BET YOU they won't approve of how he acts.

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A female reader, Aunty BimBim Australia +, writes (13 February 2014):

Aunty BimBim agony auntTalk to your parents, there are options available to them that are not available to you, they could approach the boy calmly and let him know his behaviour is unacceptable and he needs to stop it, they could approach the school direct, or they could, depending how bad his behaviour his, even consider a restraining order.

Under no circumstances should you consider taking him back.

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