A
female
age
18-21,
anonymous
writes:I'm a 19 year old female from Ireland and my problem is that I can seem to manage intimacy with anyone. I'm attracted to girls and I don't have a lot of trouble finding those who are attracted to me(not in an arrogant way) but I just feel that I either am not interesting in sex or even kissing most of the time. It all just feels like too much effort. I have only ever had one relationship and it was long distance. I'm scared that I'll end up alone. How can I overcome this frigidity?
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frigid, kissing, long distance Reply to this Question |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, baby duck + ♥, writes (1 March 2008):
Stop focusing on a goal, an end, 'an intimate relationship'.
Focus on your path. Instead of comparing yourself to what you think you are supposed to be or what others tell you to be, just observe. Don't judge. Ask yourself what you feel and think instead of criticizing yourself because you don't feel and think some elusive feelings and thoughts. Blech! That is not living ... it is existing ... and it sounds horrible. You sound like you've cast yourself as the mutant monster in your own movie.
Once you have a better idea of who you are and you love yourself for the whole package, positive and negative traits that combine to be the perfect you, you can start asking the long range questions. Don't bother right now, though ... you're just stressing yourself out.
Enjoy the process.
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