A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I told my gf i loved her about a month ago and she said it back to me right away, but she will never say it to me unless i say it to her first. She will reply with "I love you too" but will never say it unless i say it first. I've talked to her about how I want her to say it first once in awhile, but she still never does. She may have one time just because I got mad about it, but other than that she never has. Whenever we talk about it I ask her if she really loves me and she always says she does and says she loves me sooo much. We always have fun when we are together too. But I recently stopped saying it because she never will tell me first and I feel like i am trying to force her to say it. It has a been a week now and she hasn't said it and just acts like she doesn't even realize that I stopped saying it. I'm soo in love with her and want to be with her but I can't stand always thinking she doesn't feel the same way. What should I do? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, straight to the truth  +, writes (28 July 2010):
The "I love you's" are a tricky thing for us women because if we say it first or if we say it to often men can sometimes get scared off or feel like we are rushing things so we tend to let the men lead the way.
maybe she simply finds it hard to say first, if she can say it back then she obviously feels the same way.
try not to force her into saying it and dont makeit seem like it is such a huge deal, if you like this girl then reassure her with the occassional "i love you" and in time she will start saying it first.
A
female
reader, PilAvKarlek +, writes (28 July 2010):
I say let it ride for another week or so… I can just about guarantee that she has noticed that you stopped saying it. Give it a bit more time and she’ll most likely bring it up in conversation or say it to you.
As for whether she feels the same about you, I don’t have all the facts about your relationship so I can’t give an educated answer the best I can do is this…
You told her for the first time about a month ago and she is still with you even though she won’t say it first, so that is a good sign. She has some pretty strong emotions towards you otherwise she would have fled when you busted out the L word. She may love you back and just be uncomfortable with saying it first, as some people are. Or she is on the verge of loving you back but doesn’t quite feel “there” enough to say it first.
I wouldn’t worry about it too much, like I said let it ride for a bit longer before you get too concerned.
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