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How can I give my boyfriend a blowjob without hurting him?

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Question - (13 February 2008) 6 Answers - (Newest, 8 March 2010)
A female United Kingdom age 36-40, anonymous writes:

My boyfriend has phimosis which means he can't pull his foreskin back without it hurting him. I want to give him a blow job but am unsure how to do this because of the phimosis and I really don't want to hurt him. Any ideas on the best way to do this?

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A male reader, uncutdan United States +, writes (8 March 2010):

uncutdan agony auntwow don't have him get circumcised. he needs to work on stretching the frenulum and foreskin. He can use some topical anesthetic like ambesol (yeah its for your teeth and gums but its what i used, and it worked) He needs to work to strech the skin and eventually will not have pain, but if he does the urologist can do a procedure called a frenuloplasty to cut just the frenulum which is keeping the skin from going all the way back.

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A male reader, Namatjira United Kingdom +, writes (17 February 2008):

There is a difference between pulling the foreskin back to clean when he is not erect and pulling it back during sex. However is he gets in the habit of cleaning at least once every day then the skin will stretch and it will become less painful. You will find that uncut guys are more sensitive on their glans (the head of the penis) than a guy who has been circumcised and this is understandable if you think about it. Another factor that can make a difference is how much his penis expands from at rest to fully erect. This can be quite different from one man to another and if he is one of those guys whose penis at rest is fairly small but when erect is average or larger, then that will mean his foreskin is already being stretched a lot.

Do not worry about it as there are plenty of oral techniques that do not require pulling it back but you should insist that he makes sure he is clean by pulling it back to wash when in the shower. Any kind of cheesey or 'off' odour and you should be cautious as this is how infections can start and spread.

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A female reader, Cherriepie United States +, writes (13 February 2008):

Cherriepie agony auntIf he doesnt pull his foreskin back, how can he keep it clean down there? When i discussed this with my boyfriend he told me it was painful too when he started to pull the skin back, but after practice the pain goes away. This was before we met....before he started pulling it back he had normal sex with the hood still covering the head. right now if he gets an erection it just pops out on its own. SOmehow i thnk your boyfriend can do the same and you can gently try to ease it out with him...its going to hurt, but this is normal for uncut guys. Just like when you first have sex it hurts. He should see s doctor though, they can give him better advice.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2008):

Ask a Jewish friend if you have one, as Jewish boys are circumcised, which means they have no foreskin.

LJ001's advice sounds good, although you might be better off having intercourse.

Happy Valentine's!

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A female reader, duskyrowe United Kingdom +, writes (13 February 2008):

duskyrowe agony auntI have never heard of this condition called Phimosis. Is there any way that he could have circumsision to cure this problem. Eek I feel sorry for the poor guy, I think you guys should put the oral sex on hold until he gets his problem sorted. Hope I have been of help. Dusky xxx.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2008):

Simply, try not to pull it back. Use your tongue around his head and shaft still, but don't suck to hard or take his penis too far into your throat. Just generally be gentle and considerate - maybe open your mouth a little wider than you normally would. And remember, no teeth.

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