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How can I get my boyfriend to give me some space?

Tagged as: Breaking up, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (4 November 2010) 3 Answers - (Newest, 4 November 2010)
A female United States age 30-35, *shieebabiee writes:

As you read my other post my ex and I are still on a break but I just can't get the past out of my head. i'll know he'll never change although he cries to me and says that's the past, it still hurts me because I put one hundred percent effort in our relationship and now I feel why should I try? if he truly loved me than he wouldn't have done all those thing to hurt me, I know what I need I need is space at least but he still wants to keep being around me to make sure i'm not talking to guys and I never got to go out with my friends because of him and now I feel like he made me miss out on every thing. I tried telling him over and over I can't do this any more I don't believe you any more and its true hmmm Idk what to do ugh

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A female reader, ashieebabiee United States +, writes (4 November 2010):

ashieebabiee is verified as being by the original poster of the question

ashieebabiee agony auntThank you and yes deep down I still love him very but ugh its just I can't trust him for any thing

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A female reader, Beccabeck United States +, writes (4 November 2010):

Beccabeck agony auntIt sounds like you don't have any reason to be with him...if you're certain he won't change then don't waste your time. It'd be different if you still had feelings for him but it doesn't seem like you do. It seems like you're still with him because you feel bad for him, and that's no way to live...you'll make yourself miserable. Just break it off completely and go pursue the things you feel like you've missed out on.

Hope this was helpful :)

Beccabeck

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A male reader, Fineguy277 United Kingdom +, writes (4 November 2010):

Hello,

It may be that there is something you are doing that makes him feel insecure. You need to explain your feelings to him. Tell him that you need sometime off to get your head through. Some men will interpret you telling him you need space as a sign that you do not want to continue with the relationship. This will make him more insecure and keep pressuring the more. Explain to him that this is not the case. Explain what you mean about space you need. Do you need contact once a week? e-mail contact? or you dont want to contact him for the next month. Perhaps you prefer contact with e-mail during which you can take your time to answer him. The important thing is to be clear about what you want. If he loves you, he'll give you the space that you need. You need to communicate to him in a loving way. I had a girlfriend who told me she wanted some space. I forgot about her and started seeing other people. She came back after about a week. I've also asked some of my friends for a break. So, I think it is normal but you need to communicate in a loving way. Hope this helps

F

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