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How can I change myself so that he desires more intimacy with me?

Tagged as: Age differences, Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (27 July 2009) 4 Answers - (Newest, 9 August 2009)
A female Canada age 41-50, anonymous writes:

Dear Cupid

I am in a relationship with a man in his late 40's and I am in my late 20's. The question is about our sex life. He does not do much foreplay, when we do have sex and outside of this act, casual hugging and kissing is just not his cup of tea. What can I do to change myself, so that he desires more intimacy with me?

View related questions: foreplay, kissing, sex life

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A female reader, thatgothgirl20 United States +, writes (9 August 2009):

thatgothgirl20 agony auntTalk to him about these issues. If he refuses to talk with you about them, obviously he is not the one for you, and find a stress-free time to do it in, so he's not likely to get easily frustrated and dismiss what you are saying.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (9 August 2009):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Thanks for the advice. He is occupied right now with work and he is self-employed so he has to get his own jobs. I have tried to listen to him talk about work but alot of it I do not understand and he is withdrawing more. He wants to play his computer game, instead of talk and stays away at work long hours. If you have a tip of something small I could do, his rejection is making me not want to try anymore.

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A female reader, Starlights United Kingdom +, writes (27 July 2009):

Starlights agony auntsome people pick up habits, and as they get older its a bit difficult for them to change their ways.

i wouldnt say give up on him tho,

good sex is about both partners feeling satisfied.

maybe u should encourage him with compliments about what a great kisser he is but only if he did it for longer...

prehaps even dress up nicely in the bedroom for him, to encourage him into more foreplay.

good luxk

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A female reader, thatgothgirl20 United States +, writes (27 July 2009):

thatgothgirl20 agony auntI don't think that you need to change yourself. If you are keeping yourself clean I don't see why he is acting this way.

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