A
female
age
30-35,
*oldiefoxxx
writes:Ive been spending time with a friend were both in relationships. Were purely friends. Last night we redboxed a movie and as we were leaving we ran,into his girlfriend she was very unhappy. I was then informed by james that his gf wasnt aware we were spending time together. My older sister whom I do not get along with at all recieved a call from the gf bcuz shes friends with both of them and,apparently complained to my sister about me after her james and myself cleared things up or so I thought. I was called many nasty names. And to be cruel my sister threw my abortion in my face once again. I was sixteen no money or job and the bf was in the same position. It would have been wrong to keep it . It would have been my parents responsibility. They re broke. I wasnt about to do,that to them. Not to mention the guy was abusive. Anyway she threatend both james and myself to stay awAy from eachother. We did nothing wrong. She threatend to beat me up and accused us,of sleeping together. Again were friends., should I leave him alone ive already told off my sister and told her ill do as I please and that the situation was infact harmless. It,appeared one way but was infact another.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 August 2011): Your sister was wrong to hurt you all over again about your abortion. Your abortion was the most appropriate thing to do.Lets talk about your male friend.:He has a gfHe sees u alone without his gf.He went to the movies with u without telling his gfCan u now see why she is upset. This "friend" is crossing boundaries by being "friends" with u at the expense of his gf. Right now there are 3 people in this "relationship" and this is wrong.Sure u can go out with this guy and his gf tags along too. That is the adult thing to do. Sneaking around with u and getting "caught" by the gf is just plain stupid.Can u imagine if your bf was with his "friend" and took his friend out at the expense of you?Yes be friends with this guy BUT know your place.LoveGirl
A
female
reader, No-suger-coating  +, writes (18 August 2011):
 Your sister had no right to throw such personal hurtful things sbout your past into your face like that.
Family is family and although she may not have been on your side she should have defended you to this girl when she phoned and called you abusive names.
Actually his girlfriends accusations says more about her own insecurities then it does about you.
Dont fall out with your sister over her, she has some trust issues that she must work out together with her boyfriend.
At this stage my best advice to you would be to step back and let them sort it out.
Together they can work on her fears of his fidelity and friendships between female friends ( if she continues to isolate him anymore from his friends on a regular basis it will only push him away in the long run anyway.)
Let them be, he will let you know when things calm down and she is more comfortable with you being around again, trying to stay in this trio at this point will only make things worse for him, and then it may mess up your friendship indefinatley.
Know that you are the bigger person and that you are secure in your own relationship, you are a good friend as well-but maybe for now work on keeping the piece with your sibling and let your friend sort his relationship out.
Im sure it wont be long before you are back in his life.
And when you do, make sure you make it clear to him that he must make sure his girlfriend is aware you are back in his life-as you do not care to be back in the firing line of her mouth again.
Good luck.
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