A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi, I have been dating this guy for 3 months and at the beginning of the relationship he was all over hills for me. But now I feel as if he has been apart for a little bit. I confronted him two weeks ago and he said everything was fine. But he used to texted me in the mornings, afternoons, and night and now not so much. I don't understand. I am trying to be cool and collected but it seems to me that this guy is not interested anymore. This week he has family in town and I am trying to leave him alone; but come on now a days everybody is on their cellphones and even if they are with their family it only takes a minute to say good night. Not sure how to approach to this situation or if i am overreacting a little bit as I have developed feelings for this guy. What is your advice? What should i do?
View related questions:
text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2015): I think there is too many relationships now built round how much someone is texting you. However, I do think its still nice to hear from your partner just a quick Hi how you doing? Or How's your day being? Just to let you know that, that person is thinking of you no matter how busy they are! Just dont base your relationship on how much he is texting you. Keep your life busy too.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (27 May 2015):
 Pretend you are John and Abigail Adams. They spent a good deal of their marriage which was a very passionate love affair apart. they spent their time writing letters.
IN fact, their letters are very important to the history of the USA.
Basically human nature has not met up with technology. Just because you CAN be in contact 24/7 does not mean you should.
Men often come on like gangbusters at first. They call constantly, they text constantly, they want to see you constantly. Much like puppies.
then as the relationship settles into reality, life intrudes and they can't and don't get in your face 24/7.
When this happens MOST women over react and call him or text him or ask "what's wrong"
when in reality NOTHING is wrong.. he's just pulled back to assess the situation.
LET HIM GO figure it out. IF he wants you he'll find you.
I learned this with my now husband. I truly did NOT care if he got in touch with me or not. I was busy having my life. A week went by.. hmmm.. I guess we are done. TEN DAYS later an emai.l comes in.... he was ready.
From that moment on he was in my face every day.
...............................
A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (27 May 2015):
 What I would do? Is try not to conduct a relationship over texting.
If you two MEET up and SPEND time, how much he texts is irrelevant (and no, not every is on their phones 24/7)
He probably texted a LOT in the beginning to ensure YOU stayed interested and then went back to texting less because THAT is who he is.
From most of the post I see here on DC guys AREN'T as much into texting as women are. Seems like they do NOT need that constant contact. And considering how people used to to have full and rich lives (including a dating life and marriage) WITHOUT cell phones, I can see why some aren't such a fan of it.
90% of the stuff people text these days are impersonal and not important - it's more of "I'm at the store and not on my phone OMG!! what is wrong with my life!!)
LET him enjoy his family this week. Though you COULD call him and TALK to him, see how he is doing. It might not be a long conversation (save those for when in person) but a short and sweet hey I was thinking of you, how is the family visit going?
I know I'm old fashioned, I STILL believe texting should be reserved for short "emergency like" info - Like going to be 30 minutes late - out of milk, grab a 2%.... NOT for carrying on a relationship or friendship.
My advice, SPEND time with him IN person. GET to know WHO he is as a person. Don't focus so much on the texting.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2015): he has worked his textual charm and now you are smitten.He may have family and maybe you are a passing fling..or he has just run out of credit ..or romantic things to text you. Maybe the web site he looked those deep thoughts up has been shut down and for all you know he may be dyslexic and unwilling to chance his own version of i evol u... so take it from me he put 3 minths of texting in to catch you and the bait has bitten. Now that youre on the line he will reel you in when hes ready so little fish, think of what you really want cos 3months worth of texting means very little indeed.
...............................
|
