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He's dragging his feet over a second meeting?

Tagged as: Online dating<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (31 May 2015) 4 Answers - (Newest, 2 June 2015)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

About a month ago I met this great man online. He had some health problems and we weren't able to meet in person for a while but we'd spend long hours texting on Skype or talking on the phone. Finally, the day came in which we met. We spent the whole afternoon together and talked about seeing each other again but didn't fix a date. It's been another month and we still haven't seen each other. We talk everyday, but whenever I say about going out again he says he can't now because he's extremely busy.

He's an entrepreneur setting up his business so I understand that he's very busy, but I'm concerned that he's just not that interested in me and that's why we're not going out. I have asked him about this and he insists that he is and that he will make time for me when they settle down a bit. I do think that he's somewhat interested in me or he wouldn't take the time to chat with me every night... but... should I keep waiting?

For the record, he's not married and has no children. His business is pretty much his life. He's also 10 years older than me.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (2 June 2015):

Forget it!! Don't feed his ego anymore by talking to him every day. He has had a whole month to see you. That's enough. Stop taking his calls. He is wasting your time, and furthermore, how do you know that even if you did have a second date, he would not go off for weeks again? Go stone cold on him. You are 'busy, out or not available'end of. Get back on that site and start dating someone who is at least available!! Good luck.x

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A female reader, Euphoria30 Germany +, writes (31 May 2015):

Dear OP,

I agree with the other agony aunts.

IF he was interested in you, he would make time. Sure, entrepreneurs work a lot, but remember, he was able to spend a whole afternoon with you on the first date.

AND if he was really too busy to have two dates in the same month, then he's not relationship-material, anyway. You don't want a partner who's only living at the office, and then suffering a nervous breakdown and burnout in a few months/years from now.

My advice: Next guy.

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A female reader, CindyCares Italy + , writes (31 May 2015):

CindyCares agony aunt Yep. Either he is far from as keen as he says, or he is very busy... with multiple dating and your number hasn't come up yet.

I would not wait around for his convenience. I am not saying he should be foaming at the mouth , impatient to see you- but, geez, if this is all the enthuiasm he can muster ,I guess you can give it a miss.

Also because, if really his health problems and his new business limit so severely the time he can invest on dating- then he should be sensible enough to accept that now it's not the right time for him to pursue women , and just stay AWAY from dating sites to begin with.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (31 May 2015):

Honeypie agony auntHonestly, I would presume as you did that he ISN'T as keen as he might be claiming OR that he is seeing more than one women at the moment.

Personally, ONE date in over a month? Wouldn't make me wait around for him to have "a quiet time" in his business.

I think it's up to you and HOW interested YOU are in this guy if you are willing to give him a little more time or not.

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