A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi, I have a confusing story. I am a lesbian born and bred, but nearly 12 years ago i fell in love with a man. I have never been attracted to him, but i knew there was something about him that i loved. We are married in a good relationship and he knows everything about me and is fine. As we are both unable to fully give each other everything we need, we are in a stable and comfortable enough relationship to want to bring a girl into our family.We have discussed this a lot and we are both comfortable and happy and have no doubts or jealousy about the relationship we would have. I have only one rule though, the girl has to bisexual and she has to be equally involved with the both of us. My husband is also happy with this as neither of us want to date outside of our own relationship. My help is needed in how to find someone. We have become members of dating sites but the people are rarely genuine. We have also become members of Polyamory sites, but we are not looking for partners outside of each other, but a girl who will be a part of both of us, someone who we will all be involved with and do everything together. Our search has only brought up girls who are looking for a quick 'threesome' and not the long term partnership we are looking for.Is there anywhere we can find people, more importantly, girls who are looking to join a stable relationship in a poly type way?Thanks!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (8 November 2010):
 Am afraid i dont have the answer here for you, but if i am honest you are going to find this very difficult, its going to be hard to get a girl to commit to this. For the simple fact is most girls want there own partner or else a bit of fun but it wont last. Also you need to think about things more, what if you find a girl who is bisexual but once she gets to know you both she might take a preference to one of you and although you dont see now it might cause a lot of trouble for you and your husband if she shows all of her attention on one person, also she could start getting jelous of one of you and that would cause problems, im not sure what to tell you here or were you wil find a woman willing to live this life, i think the best place to do reasearch is on poly web pages, thats the only idea that i would have.
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