A
female
age
30-35,
*heaterlover
writes:In summary, I'm a girl, who can't make her own decisions, so I could really use your advice...I've been dating this guy for the past nine months. I really care about him, but our relationship hasn't really been the best. He's been spending all his time at his beach house this summer, so I haven't seen him in over a month. And he's not really one for texting either, so for a month, all i've got from him are "lol"'s and "kool"'s. And even when I do see him, we never do anything more than kiss. In nine months, we have never made out, and up until now, that hasn't bothered me- but now I'm pretty tired of waiting. But he's super trustworthy, and I know I can tell him any secret, and that he'd keep it. Like I said, I really care about this kid, but sometimes I feel like we aren't really dating- just friends with a title. But when school starts again, we'll go back to seeing each other every day and I'm not sure if this problem would exist anymore.Meanwhile, there's this guy that I work with that seems to really like me. He's super funny and texts me non stop. But we go to different schools, so I think after the summer, it would get pretty hard. And plus they say you shouldn't date co-workers, because if you do date and break up, it makes it awkward in the work place. But he treats me with a lot of respect, and we never run out of things to talk about, but I've only known him for a few weeks. He flirts a lot, and I guess I do too, but I try to keep it to a minimal, that way I don't feel like I'm cheating on my current boyfriend.So pretty much, to sum this all up- do you think I should stay with the trustworthy guy who I have a 9 month history with, or go with the new guy that would act like a real boyfriend should?
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 July 2010): You are over thinking your relationships for someone who is your age. To me, you don't have a boyfriend. Just tell that summer house dude that you are not interested in being with him if all you guys do is kiss and text each other "lol"s and "kool"s. End it and start fresh.
A
male
reader, BrownWolf  +, writes (21 July 2010):
 Maybe you need to leave them both and start fresh.
You see the things you don't like in one guy, and you see the things you like in the other.
So, start over with a guy who has the qualities of what you like. Life is just teaching you stuff.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (21 July 2010):
I'm not sure you're ready for a relationship. At all. When you're in a relationship, you can just switch boyfriends when he's not there or isn't ready to kiss or something. You have to work through those problems. But I don't think you're ready for a committed relationship, just at the moment. I think maybe you should just be out there having fun, rather than be in a relationship at the moment.
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A
female
reader, Oregongrl1 +, writes (21 July 2010):
Well it seems like you are not ready for a study BF if you are still flirting! but yet you want to know if you should stay w/ the one who never text you appose to the one who flirts and text you all the time? it just seems like you are confused or you are not ready to date one person so enjoy your life! and you'll figure it out.
Good Luck!
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A
female
reader, theaterlover +, writes (21 July 2010):
theaterlover is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhoneypie, i do care about them both. its just that i was trying to give all the facts, so maybe thats why it came off that way. i've just been trying to figure this all out for a few days now, and i figured i'd get an outsiders opinion.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (21 July 2010):
 You seem like you are talking about shoes or underwear not guys you actually care for....
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