Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, angelDlite  +, writes (4 January 2011):
 it should be a two way street, not him expecting you to start it every time. he sounds like he's got a low sex drive, how old is is? do you think he could be stressed or depressed even? it could even have an underlying medical cause so he should see his doctor. or maybe he has very low confidence about himself sexually, but if he carries on like this, he's not doing YOUR confidence any good is he?
xx
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female
reader, Mjfbla  +, writes (4 January 2011):
 He is talking about sex. Maybe thats his way of starting it
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female
reader, KitKatsAndInsomnia +, writes (4 January 2011):
KitKatsAndInsomnia is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for all the helpful advice. I dunno. He does work full time and I think he does want to do it but he gets lazy. I work part time but do all the cleaning, laundry, cooking etc. For a time he did expect me to instigate it every time because he works more and that didn't seem right. I still find he wants me to instigate it it, but I feel it should e somewhat mutual...thats hard when someone has to start it. I guess it's turned into a matter of principle than passion. We need to fix that...
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female
reader, angelDlite +, writes (30 December 2010):
hi
do it with the lights on then ;) seriously though have you asked him why he behaves like this? it definitely doesn't sound right. does he drink alcohol or take any drugs that would make him sleepy in the evening? is he on any prescription medication? when you say he talks about it, do you mean on the phone to you or does he say things in the day when he is actually with you? if so, no problem, just do it then and there. what is he like when you do have sex? does he seem to lack confidence? maybe he thinks after all the talking he does about sex, you may find the actually act a dissappointment so he avoids it
xx
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female
reader, No watered down advice here! +, writes (27 December 2010):
 His talking is all HE need! Some people really get off on talking about sex. You have people who get of on Cyber sex, I think you talk too good to him. While you're looking forward to it, he has DONE something about it. Next time he want to talk about sex tell him you're busy and that you two can TALK while DOING IT! ijs!
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female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (27 December 2010):
 Some talk the talk, but can't walk the walk. Talk to him about it if this bothers you. Maybe he's a virgin? Have you ever had sex? Maybe he wants to wait for a special occasion? Does he have problems maintaining an erection?
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female
reader, needlesandpinsuh +, writes (27 December 2010):
He's tired. Most likely, from the information you give.Have you heard the song Afternoon Delight...
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male
reader, -Cufuseeeeeed-  +, writes (27 December 2010):
As a boy I can tell maybe he is scared to have sex thats why he talks about it very much. you should just talk to him and say why don't you want to have sex.
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male
reader, steph007  +, writes (27 December 2010):
Do not wait till lights out. In fact, I also prefer to have sex in the morning, or during the day. And maybe giving a head after lights out will give him some motivation to start the action.
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female
reader, DenimandLace44 +, writes (27 December 2010):
 Have you asked him 1) why he talks about sex so much and 2) why he doesn't actually want to have sex? You need to be talking together about this.
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female
reader, Mjfbla +, writes (27 December 2010):
Have you tried having sex with him or do u let him go to bed?
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female
reader, AuntyMaur  +, writes (27 December 2010):
 Perhaps he is wanting to explore intimacy outside of the bedroom.
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