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He says he wants me to have sex with another man! I am shocked..should I dump him?

Tagged as: Sex, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (1 April 2007) 2 Answers - (Newest, 1 April 2007)
A female United Kingdom age 41-50, anonymous writes:

Me and my boyfriend were discussing our sexual likings and leanings a few weeks ago.

The usual things were discussed - but I was shocked when he said that I should sleep with another man.

I asked him if I'd heard him correctly, and he said it was true. I also asked him if he had any intention of watching it, and he said no, he thinks I should have sex with another man - but he won't watch.

I feel so sick - it's like prostitution isn't it??

I'm not sure whether to dump him or not - as he has had "fads" before relating to sex - we've had various sexual practices in our sex life. he is a decent person but when it comes to sex it's like he's someone else!!

where do we go next??

please help me

View related questions: sex life, sex with another

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A female reader, Midge United Kingdom +, writes (1 April 2007):

Midge agony auntI can understand why you would take offense as personally I would too.

He may be a decent guy, but if you dont want to do it, then dont do it. I cant think of any logical reason for someone wanting their partner to have sex with another other than to get off on it.

If you love him, and he does have these tendancies to have "fads", are you prepared to live with him wanting you to do these things? And are you prepared to deal with having to do some of these things and constantly do them knowing that you really dont want to?

If he loves you, you should be able to tell him that you're not comfortable with it, and he'll be accepting and not ask again. If he continues to ask you to do it, knowing how you feel, then thats not love!

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A male reader, Ponungalungb United States +, writes (1 April 2007):

Ponungalungb agony auntDid he also mention that the person he wanted you to have sex with was Ponungalung? LOL.

Most people view sex as an intimate expression of love between two people who are in love. Some don't. Apparently your boyfriend is one of the latter. I don't think your boyfriend wanting you to have sex with another man is a true expression of love. I think he views you as a sexual play-toy. If you're not into that, then I think it's time to move on.

Good luck!

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