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female
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anonymous
writes: Hi, im 19 years old and i have been going out with my boyfriend for 5 years. But now he has broken up with me. He says he feels different, that he loves me but is no longer in love with me. Help! What can i do to show him that we are meant for each other? I love him so much i cant be without him help please! Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Jadzia1127  +, writes (29 April 2006):
 It is interesting that has been 5 years. This often gets deemed as the 5 year itch in psychology circles. One person will say they need a break or say they don't love the other person anymore. Often they already have their eye on what they want to 'itch' with.
If both parties are willing to work on the relationship the spark can be brought back, then both need to commit that it doesn't happen again. The 'itch' has a cycle and will repeat if allowed to.
The sad part is a relationship needs both parties to make it work and most these cases one person wants to make it work and the other doesn't. You can't make him not scratch his 'itch'.
The good part is most times after the 'itch' has been itched they come back to the good thing they left.
You need to ask yourself if you don't deserve better?
A
female
reader, bonym  +, writes (29 April 2006):
 My dear, you cannot show someone that you are meant to be together. If you are to be together, you will be. He obviously does not love you with the Eros love, but more the type of love you have for a family member, whereas Eros of course is sensual, or sexual. If you are only 19, you were very young when you started dating if you were together for 5 years, so you need to live and let go of this person. Without patronising you, I understand that 5 years is a long time, but if the relationship has ended in his mind, why would you want to remain together? What do you mean you cannot be without him? Is he your Oxygen you are breathing in every day, is he the water you need to remain alive, is he the blood running through your veins, is he your kidney filtering out germs from your body. The answer is NO, so of course you can live without him. We all need air to breathe, water to drink, we all have blood and need it to survive, we all have at least one kidney removing toxins from our bodies, we cant live without these faculties, but as for this man, my dear of course you can live without him. Move on and don't stay in the past, chrish what you had, but now its time for you to live and let live. xXx
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female
reader, Angel ron +, writes (29 April 2006):
 basically your man needs to know what the word love means does he love you as a frind sisiter. If he's not in love with may be he loves and cares for you like a friend but if you are unsure get him to find ouyt what he emans.
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A
male
reader, Dazzerg +, writes (29 April 2006):
 I have heard this so many times and not just from guys though. The best definition i can get in my own head is that it means that the person still cares but for whatever reason no longer wants a relationship. I have to be honest, there are no gurantees here, you may feel you were meant for each other but he may not feel that and there may be nothing you can do to change that.
Having said that, you can show him how you feel about him in sublte ways. It has to be subtle or else the pressure will most likely drive him away. Make sure you are getting emotional support from friends and those around you. People will give you alot of cliches about you being young and having alot of time and you have to bear in mind that although they are just that, 5 years is a long-time to be together.
I think you need to show him you still care in little subtle ways, even if its just texting to ask how his day is. Send him a joke that will make him laugh, do things for him that will make him smile. Hope that helps.
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