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He said I'm too vocal in bed!!! I'm totally shocked by this revelation.

Tagged as: Dating, Sex, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (3 December 2009) 5 Answers - (Newest, 4 December 2009)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Last night my boyfriend casually mentioned to me that I'm too vocal in bed. I'd never thought about it before and hadn't realised I was particulaly loud. The way he said it was very patronising and embarrassed me greatly, it has really knocked my confidence. I'm not keen on having sex with him now in case he mentions more things he doesn't like.

He told me that 'we don't want people hearing now do we' when he's the one who instigates sex when I feel uncomfortable doing it when people are in the house/may come over. I feel quite shocked that he's never told me before and the way he said it. He's usually more sensitive and I'm too nervous to have sex with him, I will constantly be thinking about the way I behave and much too embarrassed to talk to him now because of the accusing tone he used.

Out of shock I even said sorry and he said he 'forgives' me for it.

At the beginning of the relationship he said he liked hearing that I'm enjoying what he was doing now he's teasing me for it I don't know what to do.

View related questions: confidence, teasing

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (4 December 2009):

making sexy sounds by my GF during intercourse is music to my ears as long as it is not heared by her or my parents sitting in the next room watching TV.

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A female reader, Miamine United Kingdom +, writes (4 December 2009):

Miamine agony auntA suggestion for you, you like to be vocal in enjoyment.. all he has to do is kiss you, and then all the sounds will be drowned out.. good luck babes, hope your honest talk with him goes well.

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A female reader, Miamine United Kingdom +, writes (4 December 2009):

Miamine agony auntHe's an insensetive jerk... I'm sorry he embarrassed you and made you self conscious. Yes your right, now your sex won't be the same, you'll be uncomfortable and worried. You need to tell him this, tell him what that stupid comment has done to your confidence. You can't help the way you sound, your enjoying yourself and doing what comes naturally. Please talk to him, don't argue, just talk to him, like you have talked to us. If you don't talk to him, then you'll start avoiding him and be unwilling to have sex because you feel nervous and embarrassed. Sorry, young men are idiots.

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A male reader, duce00 United States +, writes (4 December 2009):

duce00 agony auntHmmm, he could keep some ear plugs next to the bed. Or even better, give him a bottle of KY and tell him to have a nice quiet evening to himself.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (4 December 2009):

Well, if it is faked vocalization don't worry about it. Just do the genuine variety. Hot! :)

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