New here? Register in under one minute   Already a member? Login244945 questions, 1084256 answers  

  DearCupid.ORG relationship advice
  Got a relationship, dating, love or sex question? Ask for help!Search
 New Questions Answers . Most Discussed Viewed . Unanswered . Followups . Forums . Top agony aunts . About Us .  Articles  . Sitemap

He said he had a bad day and cancelled our plans - now it's been three days and he still hasn't called! What should I do?

Tagged as: Dating, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (25 May 2007) 4 Answers - (Newest, 23 June 2007)
A female United Kingdom age 51-59, anonymous writes:

hi, can anybody offer me some advice please! i started seeing a guy 2 weeks ago and he paid me quite abit of attention for say the first 10 days, taking me out for something to eat at night and a quick drink and things like that. then a couple of days ago he changed and set he had had a bad day and that he may or may not come and see me that evening. i text him a couple of hours later just to ask him was he coming or not and he said he was feeling in a bad mood and that it was a bit late and that he was tired. so i text him back saying ok and that i would leave him to it and that i didnt want to annoy him and make his mood worse. ( as i know sometimes its best to just leave a guy alone if their in a bad mood.) the only thing is now is that he hasnt been in touch for 3 days. my friends have advised me not to contact him, and wait for him to approach me himself, can anybody else offer some advice? i dont really want to contact him either as i feel that i have done nothing wrong and he did tell me that he was in a mood.

View related questions: hasn't called, text

<-- Rate this Question

Reply to this Question


Share

Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question!

A female reader, anonymous, writes (23 June 2007):

This is a tough one because I'm sure you really want to call this guy. Whatever you do, don't. He cancelled on you, it's his turn to ask you out now. If he doesn't, he has made his lack of interest in you very clear. I had a friend who was getting mixed messages from a guy ie sometimes he would cancel or go away on a trip without telling her, so she decided she would disappear for about a week. This guy phoned about 10 times on a Saturday trying to find her because he didn't know where she was. When she spoke with him, she just said she had been busy. I think the lesson learned is that if he comes after you, he is worth your time and effort. If he doesn't...well you have your answer. Best of luck.

<-- Rate this answer

A male reader, DV1 United States +, writes (26 May 2007):

DV1 agony auntGive it a week or two, and see if you hear anything. If you don't, move on, and don't think twice about it.

DV1

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A reader, anonymous, writes (25 May 2007):

Listen to your friends, and wait for him to contact you. You have been seeing him just 2 weeks...you are still in the non-comittal, "getting to know" you, friend phase. The words "bad mood' made me sit up and take note. While mood swings are genetically common with a lot people, it could mean he has some emotional troubles, such as stress, depression and a whack of other untasty little things..he is trying to cope with. Some people do suffer from depression and are embarrassed to tell new people coming into their life they deal with this. Have you ever noted any telling signs that he's a bit complicated? Perhaps he likes you and doesn't want to tell you for fear of you...running away from him and this problem. That is a possibility. But if you don't think this is a problem, then understand that it's just been two weeks and irregardless of what he's said, his actions are speaking louder. Learn to discern that. Some reasons are: He's had time to think about it and decided he's not for you or his interest has waned or he has other potential interests or he's playing a game. In which case, while these are the likely reasons why this guy will not want to take a friendship to the next level, it really doesn't matter what they are or if they make any sense to you. The bottom line is that if you should not have to be the aggressor, if you have to chase, if you have to do the asking out and the constant communicating, nine times out of ten, he's just not that into you and he loses, bigtime. Some people may suggest he wants to go slow. My take on that is-- If a guy truly likes you, but needs to take things slow, he will let you know that right away. He wouldn't keep you guessing, because he'll want to make sure you don't get frustrated and go away. This guy is not doing this. He's not for you...so move on, get out there, laugh, date and have a blast and..... forget about this other guy and tell yourself-you truely deserve a more affectionate, attentive boyfriend. He's out there...now get going and go find him. Good luck and be happy.

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A male reader, nologo Ukraine +, writes (25 May 2007):

nologo agony auntHe said that he was in bad mood and he was tired.

It's possible that this guy lost interest in you.

Such excuse is quite common, but you gotta test him anyway.

Advice about who should be the first to renew a relationship:

Regardless of what happened - the one who is more interested.

In this particular case this one is you; otherwise you would not be here posting this question.

Afterthought: 3 days is not enough time to start worrying.

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

Add your answer to the question "He said he had a bad day and cancelled our plans - now it's been three days and he still hasn't called! What should I do?"

Already have an account? Login first
Don't have an account? Register in under one minute and get your own agony aunt column - recommended!

All Content Copyright (C) DearCupid.ORG 2004-2008 - we actively monitor for copyright theft

0.0625050000016927!