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female
,
anonymous
writes: dear cupid the situation is as follows my relationship with my b/f is hanging on by a thread it has been a v difficult relationship to let go of.i have had quite a hard time with people so far in my 26yrs but i am not bitter or anything and don't want to sound like a martyr but i have to make some decisions i have made a start am off to uni soon my 8 yr old daughter is finally setting down and happy again.BUT!this is where i need ur help i have an ex b/f who treated me well and we had a great time together but i was 16 and he was in his 20s i have thought about him nearly every day and missed him lots it seems i was at my happiest when we were together but i finished it as there was a lot of outside interference he was the only man who has not really hurt me and hes back.He says he doesnt want a relationship but will change like the weather and some of the things he does suggest otherwise. My almost ex plays with my mind making it obvious he only wants me for sex but does this in a v clever way so i am never quite sure. i am hopeless with men and need help to figure out why i cant tell when someone is playing mind games to protect myself from being hurt. and if i should just ask my ex outright then forget him i know i don't need a man right now but how can i let someone who treated me that well go.my heads in a fuzz got no memory, concentration just blank. Thanks, from a sucker for punishmentX
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 May 2006): He may have treated you well before but hes not exactly being fair with you feelings is he?
Not making a person your seeing, clear on your feelings for them or the status of your relationship, is kinda keeping them hanging, knowing that youll be there because you want more, but getting the physical rewards from the relationship without having to commit, is commonly known as using.
Im not sure if he intends to act this, he could be unsure on the extent of his feelings for you, so h may think that this is a way of avoiding a sticky situation.
If you are ok with the casual thing then i urge you not to hang any feelings on it.
If however you are unhappy with it i feel you have a right to ask him his intentions, you then have the choice of being a part of it orgoing your own way without him.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 May 2006): sorry all wasnt very clear there are two men here my ex and someone who is almost an ex, confused yet.thanks its a long story x
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A
female
reader, Jadzia1127  +, writes (29 May 2006):
 Listen to your head, you know what is going on. Actions speak louder then words.
He might have treated you well back in the day but he is not now. Everyone changes over the years and it sounds like his changing was not for the better.
You deserve to be happy and he is not doing it for you. You deserve better!
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