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He is so selfish during sex I was nearly crying!

Tagged as: Dating, Sex, Teenage, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (30 June 2012) 8 Answers - (Newest, 1 July 2012)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, *ebeccaa writes:

I need help! My boyfriend is so selfish in the bedroom, we acctually end up arguing. He is my first sexual partner, I always do everything for him. We normally start kissing then go straight to having sex, and sometimes he goes so deep it hurts my stomach for the rest of the day, after he asks me to give him a blow Job and I do I hate doing it but I do it for him, after I ask him to return the favour and he sometimes says no im hungry I'll do it tomorrow but when tomorrow comes it will be I'll do it tomorrow but when that come I'll end up giving him another blow job but more than likely he won't want to give me a turn there was one thing he really wanted and he said if l did it I could have my turn and he promised it took me a while but i eventually agreed. I never wanted to do it but I did and I was nearly crying but I did it, and after he said no I'm hungry I'll do it tomorrow now tomorrows here and he still refuses. What do I do

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A female reader, person12345 United States +, writes (1 July 2012):

person12345 agony auntLike Cerberus said, if you want to stop being treated like a doormat, stop acting like one. It's time say no. He is treating you like a hole to masturbate into and you are the only one who can change that. It sounds like it's time to end this relationship.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2012):

Run for the hills... This guy is a douche. Get out while you can, otherwise you'll be trapped in a vicious circle which will be impossible to escape. He sounds like he could be violent too, does he get angry if you refuse him? you're young, move on NOW. Like all the other posters have said, this is no way to be treating a human being. I wish you the best of luck!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2012):

You stay there, shut your mouth and pleasure him like the good little doormat that you are.

Pretty harsh words right?

But that's your life OP, that's who you've become and that's exactly what you're going to do too because he owns you.

You're not going to listen to the other posters and do what you know in your heart you should do because you're either too weak, too scared, too stupid or think so little of yourself that you don't think you deserve to be treated better.

Pretty vicious thing to say to someone looking for help isn't it?

Those words are nothing compared to the relationship you're in right now but you still stay, and you will keep staying with him too.

So what you should do is go, what you're going to do is stay being treated like a bitch and wait and hope something magical happens to change him into a loving guy.

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A female reader, mavuyi South Africa +, writes (1 July 2012):

mavuyi agony auntyour haPpiness comes 1st. Teach yoself dat grl.

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A male reader, anonymous12345150 United Kingdom +, writes (1 July 2012):

dump him.he sounds like the biggest nob head ever

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A female reader, fi_the_tree United Kingdom +, writes (1 July 2012):

fi_the_tree agony auntYou tell him he's a selfish asshole and dump him on the spot!!!!

A relationship is about give and take, not just in the bedroom either!! Don't stand for it, you shouldn't have to do things you don't want to for empty promises...have some self respect!

Good luck!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2012):

Assuming you don't break up with him for the wayhe is treating you, this is what you do:

If you don't want sex, tell him, "no, maybe tomorrow."

Next time he asks you to give him oral, you tell him, "only if you give me oral first." OR if you don't want to bother at all, say "no, i'm hungry. I'll do it tomorrow." repeat until he gets the point.

If he is hurting you during sex and you tell him to stop and he doesn't, you need to break up with him. If he is a violent person or unpredictable, you need to do it in public in a place that has a lot of people.

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A female reader, katiekate United States +, writes (30 June 2012):

katiekate agony auntDump him. He's selfish and has no desire to pleasure you. He's basically using you as a way to get off. What is the rest of your relationship like?

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