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He is my first date with an uncircumcised penis and that... turns me off. I want to break up, should I tell him why?

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Question - (17 December 2007) 75 Answers - (Newest, 2 November 2012)
A female United States age 41-50, *enna1980 writes:

I've been dating this guy for a little over 3 months now. I think he's great and want to have a long-term relationship with him. The problem is, I don't sleep with my boyfriends until we've dated a little while aad I'm sure I really like them for them, not just attracted to them.

This past weekend we went out for a romantic dinner and back to his place to watch a movie. I intented to fool around for the 1st time with him, but not go all the way, maybe oral if I wanted too. Well fooling around, I took off his pants/boxers, and was surprised. He isn't circumcised. This is the 1st guy I have ever seen that wasn't, and I was completely turned off. I ended up giving him a handjob only because I was so gagged out by his penis.

I don't want to break up with him, but I also know that I will never ever be attracted to his naked body (because of his uncircumcised penis). My older sister married a guy from Italy who isn't circumcised, and she hates it. She has sex with him (and doesn't enjoy it), but will never touch him or give him oral. It is a big fight in their marriage, I think he knows that he repulses her. I don't what to get into the same situation.

I would think it wouldn't be right of me to suggest that he get's it fixed since we're only dating 3 months, and he is 28 years old. But I know I will never ever be able to be happy with his penis. I guess I need to break this off before I get more attached. Should I tell him why?

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (2 November 2012):

Honesty with your sexual partner is the best gift you can offer. Ease of personal hygiene and general female preference in America suggests that a circumcised penis is best. The concern about pain can easily be addressed by making sure the surgeon takes the extra precaution to control pain through proper meds. Having the procedure done is the best thing I have done for myself and future partner for intimacy.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (28 October 2012):

For anyone who thinks that circumcision is good and that an intact penis is unhealthy, please read this. Maybe you will learn how much better it is to be intact, for the man AND the woman: http://www.sexasnatureintendedit.com/10F/doctor_northrup.html

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (8 February 2012):

Cut and uncut penises DO NOT look the same when erect. On about 60% of uncut penises the skin retracts automatically when erect, looking like a cut one.... but about 40% don't.

When I was uncut and erect, my foreskin still covered th ewhole of my head. Sex was uncomfortable...so I got cut. Best decision ever!

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A male reader, daniel-fr France +, writes (30 January 2012):

daniel-fr agony auntHi,

I'm so curious why that turn you off ? can you explain me ? once a penis is erected there is no foreskin anyway ...so why ? is it lead with the odor ? thank you to answer.

Then I think you should tell him why if you break up. That will help him for his future.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (21 April 2011):

WOW, funniest thing I've heard. Break up with him ASAP, (even though post is from 2007). Always be honest with your partner no matter what, in this case I would burst into laughter and fulfill your wish in a heartbeat. Leaving us both happy for reasons beyond your understanding.

When I was young growing up in America I must admit I felt embarrassed about my uncircumcised penis, now I thank God I'm so lucky. What annoys me is the dumb rumors about uncut penises so as a public service; choo choo here comes the clue train:

Hygiene?- ever since man invented a dis-solvable base known as soap, there is absolutely no difference between an washed uncut penis and a freshly washed dinner plate.

STDS?- First time I heard of this one. Cut or uncut, you'll catch one if you stick it where it don't belong.

Shorter sex?- Technically, sure. Because unlike our circumcised counterparts we can FEEL pleasure. I can't imagine the pain of my penis head being cheese grated inside my underwear all day to the point where it starts chafing/ scaring and developing a thick outer skin on the head which causes less sensation during sex. In-fact, I read that some men soak their circumcised penises in a shampoo "cocktail" filled balloon all day to remove the crusty FLAKY wrinkly outer layer of skin. For some reason that causes the thick skinned head to flake off and regrow newer skin beneath(the kind that’s protected by foreskin naturally)Imagine having a piece of penis skin stuck in between your teeth next time you give head girls, literally. To add more to this, with a circumcised head as described above, add a condom on and you can slam your mans dick in a car door and he won't feel a thing. Hence why all circumcised men have to be jack hammers to orgasm, I have a choice.

From personal experience, if your complaining about your man not lasting long enough maybe you should put out more so he gets used to it. My wife understands that after a week of no sex it’s going to happen relatively quick, especially without a condom. I don't know about most men but 1 minute afterward I'm ready to go again, and much longer lasting since its harder to reach climax. And she's really lucky if she can make me orgasm a 3rd time within 3 hours. So that rumor is shot to shit as well.

Sorry for the rant but I can't believe how anyone could like a cheese grated dick, I feel genuine sorrow for circumcised men. Especially after learning about the "cocktails". True mutilation makes you cringe... But at the end of it all - to each their own.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (24 March 2011):

Yr soooo sad girl. Penises are supposed to be uncircumcised.. That's why males are born like that. Its only the daft notion of circumcising and brutalising babies that ppl even think "un-circumcised" is kinda strange or not normal.. In UK no one is circumcised accept the odd few. And the girls here say circumcised penis is abrasive and boring.. And Has no masculine scent like a woman's feminine scent.. Foreskin is there for a reason.. Maybe yr sis don't like it for psychological reasons. The normal penis has that form for a reason. The skin glides inside the vagina! As in the shaft skin is stationary and the penis glides inside its own skin, not abrading like a circumcised penis and the foreskin retains lubrication (unlike circumcised) Im 24 year old guy, was circumcised at 5 years old for medical reasons and now restoring my foreskin. UK girls hate circumcised, maimed, mutilated penises. And circumcision removes likke 90% of the nerves form the penis so man be desensitised slam machine instead of a nice lover :P

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A reader, anonymous, writes (20 March 2011):

I realize this is an old post, but just wanted to comment on it because I think this issue is something that apply to other couples as well. Actually, I'm a guy who did it on a girlfriends request. I don't think it's wrong for a woman to ask her boyfriend or husband to have a circumcision as long as it's done respectfully and not by force.

This seems very important to the op (opener), thus I don't think it's wrong to ask. But ask nicely, and you don't need to say what you don't like, it suffices to say that you like a circumcised penis. Also, it shows more respect if you're honest when making your request. Don't rely on showing him hints of what you'd like him to do or other types of more subtle methods. Being subtle so spare his feelings just does hurt, because it's often very easy to understand subtle hints about your body. Just ask him nicely and explain calmly why you'd like him to do it, don't lie. If you want him to do it because it looks awesome, say just that. After you've asked you also have to respect his answer, don't push him further. If he says no, you'll have to consider whether you can live with that and decide if you want to stay with him or leave. If he says yes, great, then start thinking about the procedure, which is the topic of the remainder of my comment.

There are a number of ways to perform a circumcision, and he should go to an urologist to seek out advice on how and when to get it done. You should also go with him for support and for understanding the implications of the procedure yourself. If the visual thing is important (which it usually is, and also very important to my girlfriend) it's a good idea to speak with a female urologist to get some perspective on aesthetics. Yes, they can be hard to find but there are some and we found our female urologists input valuable because she's a woman too and can relate to what she'd consider aesthetically appealing in a guy. And many female doctors tend to care more about aesthetics than male doctors in my experience.

My urologist was just fabolous, she cared so much and did a great job. She showed me and my girlfriend different plastic models of penises which showed the various types of circumcision and explained pros and cons about them. Because of this, I was able to choose the right option for us, a procedure I considered safe and with a healthy and functional outcome and also with the right "porn style" look for my girlfriend to enjoy.

Also, when it's done, give him time to heal, it may take longer than expected, and having sex before it has completely heal may hurt or it may yield a larger scar tissue than necessary. So, don't stress him, let it heal!

It is a long process, but personally I'm glad I did it. She loves how it looks and although I'm a tad less sensitive, I perform much better in bed and can almost decide when to have my orgasms/ejaculations every time, so some loss of sensitivity isn't just negative.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (18 April 2010):

GEE WIZZ I can not believe you want to break up with this guy because he is not circumcised!! This is an insult to any man.What if he thought you had ugly tits? or what if he said you had ugly JUNK?? Would you be hurt? You have to remember that not being circumcised isn't his fault, You do realize that as a new born baby he could not say yeah doc circumcise me. Im not circumcised simply because my parents didn't know what it meant..Yeah can you believe that circumcision wasn't talked about around my parents back in the 60's and 70's I was born in 1970. I have had several sexual partners and none of them ever made such statments as you are. I can't imagine what thoughts would go through this poor guys mind when He finds out you broke it off just because he is not circumcised.Hell just pull the foreskin back and it looks just like a circumcised penis trust me I know I have been doing it for a long time now. Seeing as when your not circumcised you have to keep your penis very clean due to bacterial growth under the foreskin..yeah just like you ladies with your yeast infections..In not so many words don't be an ASS about something this guy had no control over besides are you with him because of his dick? And also remember that even if you are a sexpot now you aint gonna be forever honey GRAVITY will get you one day soon cut the guy some slack afterall circumcised or not if it will get hard it does the same job and gets it done, and who knows maybe even better than most...

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A male reader, Problem.helper United States +, writes (17 April 2010):

Problem.helper agony aunti agree with shelby.

are you kidding me you want to break up because he's not circumcised wow.

i think you should break up to do him a favor

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A male reader, rockersuess United States +, writes (16 December 2009):

I am an uncircumcised dude and ive only slept with the same girl for the past two years, after a few months i had to know what she thought so when we talked about it she didn't even know what the difference was, I was the only guy she'd ever been with and she could have three orgasms in a row before i ever finished. I wouldn't recommend cutting it because it seems more uncomfortable to girls rather than a natural penis which is much more smooth. but I've still built up a complex that makes me scared to show it to any girls because of what they'll think of the way it looks. I hope girls don't just look and run so i pull it back before they even see it.

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A female reader, laura_shelby United Kingdom +, writes (26 October 2009):

Oh my god!!! What an ignorance! Typical US Hamburger ignorance. Here in Europe where the oral sex and the french kiss was invented, if you are a circumcised (mutilated) guy, you are a FREAK! unless you're muslim or jew.

Remember honey, you Americans are being brainwashed, only jews, muslims and Americans are circumcised, global estimates suggest that only 30% of males are circumcised, of whom 68% are Muslim !!!

If you like circumcised, why don't you circumcise yourself and have a barbaric female circumcision ?

And for European women, the circumcised dick looks ugly, dry, scared, and wrinkly. Circumcised sex feels like a dildo with no lub. I would never let my son be subjected to Male Genital Mutilation.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (26 September 2009):

Jenna, I think you should stay with him. He just might be your soul mate. Sex is the best with an uncut penis. It works the way nature intended it to work. It is more pleasurable for a girl. The circumcised penis feels more like a broomstick and very dry. For oral sex it feels like a dried up sausage while the uncut one is very smooth like silk and oral sex is more enjoyable. It might look like a doggy dick to you becuase you are tying to see it while it is closed. Pull back the skin and it will look the same. It is a covering that protects the head so it stays smooth, so when they guy gets older his penis will still look new. The easiest thing to do is tell him to take a showere or wash before sex and if he doesn't know how, you can show him. Pull the skin back and wash with soap. This might be the best sex you ever had. Dont' give up.

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A male reader, spurioux United States +, writes (25 September 2009):

Interesting way to put it....you first date "with an uncircumcised penis"....what about the guy?, hello? Listen, I'm not circumcised and I love my penis...fact is, I don't give a shit what any woman thinks of it....I'm not mutilating myself to please a woman...and yes,I date only women, thanks for asking. My reccomendation to you is that if what his penis looks like means more to you than he does, then break up with him FAST. Even if he is not happy with you now, he will love you for it one day....because he will find someone that actually cares about him.

Oh and, I might suggest you start sleeping with men on the first date, then you won't have this delima in the future.

Spurioux~

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (26 June 2008):

well I'm married to a man who is uncircumsized and its a wonderful sexual feeling, orgasim's back to back Wow. Woman to woman don't break up wit a good man. just cause he isn't circumsized. you might love it uncircumsized. don't knock it until u tried it. Good Luck..

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (25 June 2008):

well I'm married to a man who is uncircumsized and its a wonderful sexual feeling, orgasim's back to back Wow. Woman to woman don't break up wit a good man. just cause he isn't circumsized. you might love it uncircumsized. don't knock it until u tried it. Good Luck..

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (24 June 2008):

"My theory is if God wanted it to be circumsized he would have created them that way"

^^comment from Misti Hdz

sorry but I'm going to have to shatter your theory. If god wanted it to be circumsized, he would have created him that way? Nobody is created circumsized. It's a procedure that is done that god never intended, that's why every male is born with foreskin and uncircumsized. It is supposed to be like that for a reason. God wanted everyone to be uncircumsized, that's why he created all men with the foreskin. (assuming there is a god). Were born with it for a reason, just like we have 5 fingers, 2 hands, etc. If foreskin was a serious problem, then through evolution, males would have lost the foreskin, and males would be born without the foreskin.

To the "medical doctor" who said that uncircumsized penises have a better chance of catching an std, please tell me that was a punchline. Uncut or not, if you stick ur dick in an infested pussy, your probly going to catch the std. And if you wear a condom, an uncut penis still has the same chances for catching an std or not as a cut penis.

Oh yeah, and to the original poster, Jenna1980. That's fucking shallow. I hope he breaks up with you because you have small tits. Or your ass isn't plump enough. Whatever you heard about uncircumsized penis, it probably isn't tru. If anybody is worried about the uncut penis "smelling", have him take a shower before you have sex, like a normal couple should. Just like he don't want his girls pussy smelling like a fish. So wash up before ya'll have sex.

An uncut penis pulled back looks the same as a cut penis. So how the hell does it look ugly? Then you must think cut penises look ugly too? I feel ashamed to live in a society where women don't prefer the penis the natural way. What a shame.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (24 June 2008):

Jenna, I think you might as well tell him why, although at 28, he's probably decided not to get circumcised on his own. I've known some women who broke up with guys because they were uncircumsised, so you won't be the first. He may have had girls break up with him for the same reason anyway. My wife, who is your age, thinks uncircumcised penises are "disgusting," and compares them to women who don't trim or shave their bush. On a related note, a friend of mine from law school broke it off with a girl who was a year behind us because her bush was so big, "it had its own weather system." I thought that was overreacting, but maybe it's because he liked going down on women and I didn't (my wife shaves down there, and I've found that licking her isn't so bad after all). I did think my friend should have asked his girl if they could shave or trim it rather than just breaking up with her, but there's certainly less involved in trimming bush than getting circumsised.

I was actually circumcised when I was 21, so in answer to BigPenis's question, you get some pain meds and don't go dancing for a few days, but after a few weeks you're ready to go. I think the sex was better afterward being circumcised because the head is always rubbing against the vagina instead of being covered up half the time, and it feels good to have the shaft rub and tug against the vagina instead of just having the inside of the penis move back and forth inside the skin. It's also a lot easier to use condoms without the foreskin moving up and down and often pushing the condom forward past the head.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2008):

It sounds more to me like you & your sister have been brainwashed by society to think that circumsised is better. I have recently & for the first time been having sex with an uncircumsised man & it is waaaay better than with a circumsised one. The best sex of my life! Get over what it looks like, or better yet, learn to love it in its natural form, and enjoy it. You are a lucky girl!

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A male reader, BigPenis Canada +, writes (15 June 2008):

BigPenis agony auntOkay..Jenna1980...I respect your opinion and value it. I am 19 years old and am uncircumcised. Every person is entitled to what they like and what attracts them. Dont listen to stupid ass comments describing you as shallow, uneducated or whatever crap. You want to break up..its your relationship!!!

PS. I have a question: After reading this post and people saying just cut it off..which I am not sure of doing...Does it hurt alot?? Be honest please!!

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (11 June 2008):

I am sixteen and I have been with 3 girls. None of them had a problem with my uncircumcised penis, in fact one of them said they preferred uncircumcised to circumcised. It a matter of opinion but you should not base a relationship on whether their penis is circumcised or not, if your like him as a person taht should be enough.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (6 June 2008):

hey girl. i had the same problem as u have. one of my first times seeing the umcircumsized penis's was with a boy that i had been dating and when i finally reached down in his pants i felt it and was disgusted. i beleive it was the fact of what i heard abouth them. every since that night i backed away from him and eventually we lost contact. i never told him y and he always ask how did we grow so far apart. we had been dating for 6 mnths.

time rolled by and now i find myself in the same situation and when i turned to my friends i found that a lot of them were dealing with the same situation. this time i just went ahead and embraced his dick. the first time i hated it i felt nasty and i was scared of it but i wanted him to feel comfortable with me. now i love it and i must admit he has been the best that i have ever had in my life. sexually. sometimes it does smell and i dont know how to tell him. but ive come to love him and love his dick. its just a mind thing and what u are use to seeing

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (29 May 2008):

You dont know what you are missing. I am a 45 year old American woman born and raised in the southwith 6 kids. I had seen them but only in pictures.

I too had the same bad attitude about uncut penises that you do .

Boy was I wrong.

I married a man from Holland 5 years ago same age as me , umcut and it is the best I have EVER had period . I was afraid I would hurt him at first so I just took it slow until i learned what all I could do with it , which yes I had to do after decades of only cut ones.

They are extra fun to play with ,, you are making a mistake , approach it with an open mind first , not by what your sister tells you .

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2008):

"I am uncircumcised myself. But as an Physician I would recommend circumcision."

"As a man myself I find the guys opinions on this post quite defensive and hypocritical."

Your quite right, the guys opinions do seem quite hypocritical when you look at your own post. Im uncircumcised, I dont smell and my sex life is great. The reason for this issue is physicians like yourself using it as an excuse to make money

The fact is its the media and stupid gossip collums that make women believe these stupid things about uncircumsised guys smelling funney and having a higer chance of having aids.

If its down to sexual prefference alone then fine you dont like it I dont want to sleep with someone who doesnt find me attractive find some other sap who will chop bits of his anatomy off to please you as you seem to think its your right.

But to be honest I dont think it is sexual preference its ignorance and intolerance. I liek the way I am and im proud to be natural and not bowing to female pressure to be any different. Im not a sheep following the masses and for anyone in the medical proffesion who says otherwise be quite theres no evidence and its simply down to a matter of opinion. As with most things

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (23 May 2008):

would you be hurt if your boyfriend broke up with your breasts weren't big enough? i'm sure it would make you feel insecure.

he would feel insecure too if you told him that you didn't like the look of his penis.

anyway, if you really really want to break up with him, PLEASE don't say anything about how his dick looks, just make something up.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (12 May 2008):

I'm sorry I am a medical Doctor and I have to speak out. I am quite surprised with the judgment on this post. In particular, the judgment and ignorant comments made in large by the men.

This woman is not being judgmental at all. She is simply expressing her honest opinion about her sexual attraction to her boyfriend. I find her honesty to be rare and very mature. In fact, I see female patients all the time who have a problem with male partners who are uncircumcised. There is commonly a different odor because an uncircumcised penis is more difficult to clean.

As a man myself I find the guys opinions on this post quite defensive and hypocritical. There are guys who are completely turned off by women with small breast. This is very much the same thing. And sex is different with an uncircumcised penis. Not worst or better but different. This has a lot to do with psychologically being attractive to the guy's body. That will affect how good vaginal intercourse will be. The same holds true for women who are only attracted to circumcised penises.

Sexually desiring a partner is very important to the welfare of any lasting relationship. It is not fair for her or him to have a partner who is not truly desired by both parties. Also, while being uncircumcised is natural it is actually less healthy.

An uncircumcised penis has a much higher chance of contracting an STD or infection due to bacterial that forms because of bad hygiene.

I am uncircumcised myself. But as an Physician I would recommend circumcision.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (6 May 2008):

seriously u sound like one of those girls who has to hav everything perfect. I mean its not like every guy would like your body. its your choice but leave him alone, he will end up hating himself. u can break up with him but dont tell him to get it cut.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (6 May 2008):

Listen girl,

There are plenty of uncircumsized men in this world. Never settle for less than you want, go get exactly what you want. It's a bit of a shame because its seems like you like the guy's other qualities. But admitting that you are not attracted to him physical because of his uncircumsized penis is a mature decision in your own right.

Don't listen to the other people on this post. In fact, you don't even have to listen to me. Just listen to yourself, and decide what it is that you really want.

P:S: I was in the same situation, adored the guy and all his other qualities, but finally i could not longer ignore, being the sexual being that i am, the fact that i was turned off by his uncirced penis. For me, sex didn't feel the same, and giving head was less enjoyable. Also he was super-sensitive and always came really fast, even after 6 months of dating. Eventually I gave it up because I knew we were just not compatible sexually. I was sad at first, but in the end it was a smart decision.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (4 May 2008):

i really do not understand why this is a big deal...they both look the same when they're hard...so it does not matter.

but i guess you like whatever you see first...personally i would not mind either way.

and if you think about it...its just skin or no skin.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (4 May 2008):

You are obviously very immature about the opposite sex and sex in general. Perhaps some study in both departments might enlighten you to the point that you can appreciate nature. What about a circumcision for yourself? And if you haven't had enough opportunities to observe a natural penis, that might also help your education in that department. You need to become natural-anatomy literate. What ever gave you the notion that a guy should have surgery performed on his natural body before he or you can enjoy natural sex with natural genitals? Hygiene is required for the whole body, genitals et alia. So that's no excuse. What about penis size? Are you about to advocate surgery in that department, also, if the natural thing doesn't satisfy your illiterate notions?Perhaps you should join a convent.

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A female reader, Lady lilly New Zealand +, writes (4 May 2008):

To the guy who is 16 sayin "now i'm scared to have sex with my gf after readin this, Man i feel sorry for you reading this because even tho i understand the question that has definately touched sum sore points with people, I want to say your girl friend is with you because she is into u not just cause of how your diddle is lookin, I am 30 and from NZ i have never heard this as an issue b4 and have always gone with "ITS NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE ITS HOW YOU USE IT"!!!

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A female reader, Misti Hdz United States +, writes (3 May 2008):

Misti Hdz agony auntI am married to a guy who is not circumsized, and truthfully I prefer circumsized penises but there is no difference in the way sex feels, and at first I was repulsed just like you but then I felt bad because it wasn't his choice to be like that he was born at home and didn't have the hospital services available to him like most of us do, and I doubt his dad was going to do it with a butcher knife. Give it a little time and see what happens. My theory is if God wanted it to be circumsized he would have created them that way.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (3 May 2008):

Hey, I agree with you, circumcised penises are more aesthetically pleasing! Dont worry, you have come one here asking for advice, and you dont deserve to be answered with such arrogance! Dont listen to these highly judgemental people, many of whom are probably hypocrites..

Id like to see how many of these men -who feel they have the right to call you shallow- would react if they were going to do it doggy style with a girl, only to realise that she had alot of coarse dark ass crack hairs! Would you ask her to wax.. or is it ok because God put it there hmm?? Women have to do go through alot to suit SOME mens taste eg- monthly painful and expensive waxing, daily shaving legs. When you consider this... it is funny that people call you shallow!

Alright, nobody has the right to tell anyone to cut off anything... but this is your personal taste, and nobody should be so quick to judge either. They end up being just as closed minded as they claim you are. If I was you... just pull back the foreskin and get stuck in to some uncircumcised penis! Otherwise... what if the next guy is uncut too? If even that is too much, just tell him you've never been with an uncut guy before, and ask him to pull it back for you! Hopefully he wont be as nasty as alot of the people here!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (3 May 2008):

You were born with foreskin.An uncut penis is natural. Cut penis is not, so you should not prefer that.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (29 April 2008):

ok I would be freaked out too. but I don't think you should break up with him so soon. give it time and if you're still so repulsed by it then I guess break it off. in the end its what makes you happy.. people can call you shallow or whatever but I'd rather be called shallow and be with someone who im attracted to than be with someone im repulsed by. you can't change the way you feel about certain things. even if they do sound ridiculous to some people.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (25 April 2008):

get over it you over sheltered, undercultured, uneducated, narrow-scoped pansy

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (24 April 2008):

Ok, you sound like one of the rich female...well you know that's always had money throughout their whole life and all of a sudden is down in the wrong end of town and whining because everything is so nasty. Ewww this and Ewww that. There's always something wrong when something is out of the ordinary and stop being so shallow. Suck it up and grow up or stop having sex! There is nothing wrong with an uncircumsized man. If the roles were reversed, would you want to be thrown to the curb because your parents didn't have you circumsized? You have to think about others' feelings other than your own. This is something you can get around. So get over it.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (23 April 2008):

this is ridiculous!

i agree this girl is extremely shallow. there is way more to a relationship than his penis. you obviously aren't mature enough to be having sex.

and by the way.... not all American girls are this way... im an American girl and i could care less whether a man is circumcised or not.

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A male reader, previasc96 United States +, writes (23 April 2008):

This is why women should watch porn when they're young LOL! You don't love cock enough, that's why you can't stand hooded ones. If you did't suck and and play with it so much in the past, it wouldn't matter what is looks like, just as long as it feels good inside of you. You're just like guys who won't go near a vagina if it's not shaved! That's ridiculous!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (22 April 2008):

i just started going out with this guy and we were fooling around and i realized he wasn't circumcised. i was a little shocked at first because i didn't know he wasn't circumcised but then i gave it a little time and I'm fine with it know you just have to get used to it and if your going to dump him for that then your shallow there should be more to the relationship then just his penis.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2008):

grow up...

natural is always better

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (15 April 2008):

ha ha ha, you're so wrong..

I'm uncircumcised too, and you know what? - girls just love my penis!!!

... what a great deal if the cook is circumcised or not ))

you're probably the only one who really cares about it!

so lol!

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2008):

im uncircumsised after reading this im kinda scared to like even fuck my girlfriend because i dont know what she'll say i ddnt even know it was a big deal till just now...whoaaa..and im only 16

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A male reader, Hydro United States +, writes (3 April 2008):

im uncircumcised and the girls Iv been with has had no problems some of them says it a little bit more plesurable but i last a little bit less longer not by long though

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (3 April 2008):

I'm uncircumcised and the girls I have been with says its more plesurable and but it last only a little bit shorter

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (27 March 2008):

I just started dating a man that is a wonderful person, and guess what, he is not circumcised!!! It doesn't matter to me because that is the way that God created all men from the beginning. The practice of circumsion has been carried down through generations and thought of as a normal practice. The intimacy with him is even better than with a man that has been circumcised. God made the vagina and the penis and I know he knew what he was doing when he didn't make the penis the way we think it should be. Try it and see, I can guarantee that there is nothing wrong with a man that is not circumcised.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (19 March 2008):

I think you should give him oral sex. Look at he women in porn. They perform oral sex on a lot of uncircumcised men. So it can't be that bad.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (15 March 2008):

I just started dating the MOST AWESOME man in the world (ok, that's my opinion). He is not circumsised and that does not bother me in the least... I have never been with a man before that wasn't so I felt a little awkward, but I can learn and look forward to it. I'm sure that we will work this out and it is no way a deal breaker as far as I'm concerned.

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A female reader, daisydaresyou United Kingdom +, writes (3 March 2008):

I find this so weird, because in Europe getting unnecessarily circumcised is completely rare and only done by Jews and Muslims as a routine.

I have had boyfriends who were both circumcised and not so I really can't see what the big deal it - it's just a piece of skin, you can't feel any difference during sex, and once the guy is hard the skin is pulled down so it looks just the same.

I feel somewhat sorry for guys who are circumcised, because it reduces sensitivity a lot, so they feel less there.

Basically you need to get over yourself. Where does this weird reaction come from anyway? Is this a normal reaction to uncut (normal!) dicks?!

PS You can't fix what ain't broken. End of.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (1 February 2008):

you sound really shallow

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (24 January 2008):

Why did your sister marry a guy from Italy if she thinks he is repulsive?

What the hell is wrong with you (and your sister) for that matter?

An ugly dick is an ugly dick, circumcised or not.

Do yourself a favor and stay in America, you really shouldn't travel around the world.

As for penis talk, I am uncircumcised, and I was quite a whore in my younger days. Guess what? Only ONE girl ever noticed that I wasn't circumcised. And apparently it didn't bother her much at all since she didn't ask until after she had finished with her business...

(I am speaking of American girls, by the way -- I've been with quite a few. No other girl in the world would even waste time thinking about such inconsequential matters.)

Go get a crusty overly circumcised penis and enjoy using lots of lube, cheers

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A female reader, Cherriepie United States +, writes (22 January 2008):

Cherriepie agony auntBaby, you are so wrong. My boyfriend is uncircumsized and when when he's fully erect it looks no different than any other guy. He keeps it clean, it's well proportioned and there's nothing smelly or repulsive about it! And also sex with him is awesome! The extra skin is has a nice cushioning effect when we have sex. Do not knock it until you have tried it hun. In fact I wont go back.... I prefer guys with the extra skin now.

Your sister is a bad influence on you, I think. Your letting her realionship with her husband throw you off. If you like this guy...if you any feelings for this guy, you are being absolutely silly if you're going to throw him away because of your sister's stupid problem.

My thing is you should go all the way with your boyfriend and stop this prejudice you have with him now. The only way you will convince yourself that he's good for you if for you to DO IT.

As for asking him to get it fixed...thats crazy. That's like saying its broke! Its not broke..its perfectly normal! I would never ask a guy to to cut up his dick. That's what he was born with. When I have children my boys won't be circumcized either.

If you break up with this guy on the grounds of his penis being uncut you are an itch with a B in front of it. And the real loser is you.

The 95 percent average you threw out there is also pretty off. Where did you get that?? The majority of guys are cut, but the figure is not that big...be for real sister! Grow up!

And to mister "I would never sleep with a woman with a tattoo"....are you kidding!! You would reject a girl with a tattoo? That's just as bad! You two shallow people should just get a room.

Another thing...when you put a condom on a guys penis...which you should be doing....how can you tell if its cut or not...you can't! which proves this arguement to be about a shallow prejudice anyway.

Shallow people stay on the other side of the room. I’m happy being in the real world with normal people and accepting and loving who they are.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (18 January 2008):

Well, one of my previous boyfriends was uncut, and at first I was just as turned off as you... but you know what? I've discovered that because he slides in and out of his foreskin and not actually in and out of your vagina, you will never be chafed or dried out! I enjoyed an uncut penis a lot, so give it a try! :-)

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (12 January 2008):

tell him. and my goodness, you really shouldn't have waited so damn long.

i'm putting myself in HIS position, and trust me, we do not need you shallow whores wasting our time.

if your not digging it, get out... he'll find someone a thousand times better guaranteed. so don't feel bad for him.

but... next time you look in the mirror... i hope you realize what you're looking at.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (10 January 2008):

Have you tried pulling the skin back during oral? My girlfriend pulls it back with her lips, keeping it moist, it's great. Once it's pulled back it's the same as a circumsized one. hate to see a couple broken up over something so trivial.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (10 January 2008):

You are an absolutely shallow, selfish, narcissistic and might I add, TYPICAL AMERICAN WOMAN. If something this minor disgusts you, then break up with this guy! DO HIM A FAVOR!

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A male reader, Collaroy Australia +, writes (7 January 2008):

Collaroy agony auntTo me you sound like a shallow insensitive young lady.

I'm sure though you will meet someone equally shallow and insensitive to enjoy your life with.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (6 January 2008):

well... its nothing wrong with an uncircumcised penis... u just have to expierence with it.. it is because u just used to seeing circumcised penis and expierence with it.. maybe u shall be more expierence with an uncircumcised penis then u will not have problem with it.. its all natural that he is uncircumcised n its nothing to worry about all u have to do is just make sure he keep it clean daily and thats the way to keep it healthy n sex shall not be a big problem with it... ^_^ take care i hope this help it!!!

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (31 December 2007):

The skin of the penis you dont like so much, is still part of a penis, in the same way a girls outer parts, sometimes called piss-flaps are part of her vagina, they all have a lot of feeling in them, they may or may not look pretty, but they sure do feel good, and you guys who have had it cut off dont know what your missing.it keeps the head moist and protected from constant rubbing in underware that has to cut down on feeling.

As to hygene if you dont wash it, then it will smell, boy or girl, its not a reason to cut it off, tell him or her to wash.

If you dont like the look, then pull the skin back over the head, and it stays there.

You have to be a guy with a foreskin to know how good it feels, so I dont expect girls or guys who dont have one to know what its like, but I think all guys should have a choice, and not mum, dad or some religion to have the say on what hapens to that part of the penis that can give so much pleasure.

Paul UK with intact penis an very proud of it.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2007):

As an uncircumcised male, I say give him a chance. Maybe sex with him will be better than with the standard cut penis. It is not that difficult to keep clean, and those of us with the extra skin are aware that the foreskin needs to be pulled back when we bathe for cleansing.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (20 December 2007):

uncircumcised penis is unsanitary, disgusting, and is just wrong. Take it this way, at least it hasn't been that long yet. You can't make a guy get circumcised when for the last 20 something years he never did! Just leave him. It's not up to you to tell him why. Pass the burden to the next woman who doesn't mind an uncircumcised penis.

Leave him. You've made the decision and I am telling you that you will not regret this.

I once had a girlfriend that absolutely smelled foul down south. Everytime we have sex, I lose it because of the stench. She's sexy and attractive but the vagina was the deal breaker. I straight up broke up with her. It was emotionally difficult but I thank myself now, years later.

She since couldn't keep a relationship and is now single again. It's not up to you or to me to tell someone else that they have hygene problems. It's a fundamental responsibility. It's like telling your partner to cut their fingernails. It's not your fingernails, what do you care?

You should leave. He's not the only great guy out there. there are lots with normally clean and hygenic, circumcised penis.

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A male reader, Samutsen Poland +, writes (18 December 2007):

Samutsen agony auntJenna you seem to be an educated girl and don't be upset. You know it is your choice and you made your mind up already. S.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (18 December 2007):

Well once his penis erect the foreskin goes back and it looks the same as a circumcised one anyway!

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A female reader, Jenna1980 United States +, writes (18 December 2007):

Jenna1980 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

No, you are way off the mark because you aren't listening to what I am saying. I would never pressure a guy to do this (like I said, my comment about being fixed was stupid), but at the same time, I have the absolute right to not be attracted to an 'ugly' penis. And unfortunately, that includes the man attached to the penis.

I am funny ridiculous? How mature, and you talk about me! Most everyone here agrees with me, and I'm not going to hurt this guy by continuing a relationship that will either end, or end up in a sexless marriage where neither one of us is happy.

I'm assuming (maybe incorrectly) that you aren't circumcised since you seem to be playing the band to this topic. Didn't you ever have a woman turned off by your penis? Or do you just think you're so great that your doggy dick is the greatest gift to women? NOT.

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A female reader, Jenna1980 United States +, writes (17 December 2007):

Jenna1980 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

I'm realizing by reading these answers that peoriaman is so off mark, and obsessed with this topic, that I'm just going to disregard all his comments. They are so unrealistic that it is almost humorous (not quite, but almost).

If I'm not attracted to a man physically, then why is it wrong for me to break it off? You're acting like I should just 'put up with' something that turns me off. This is a brand new relationship, well not even a relationship yet, that's why I'm breaking it off before we get attached to each other.

I liked samutsen's answer. What if you dated a girl, and then when you saw her naked, she had tons of tatoos? And you hate them, are you obligated to continue the relationship? I think not. My comment about getting it fixed may have been wrong, but my desire to only be with someone who I am physically attracted to is NOT.

I don't like this, you're making me start to get mean in my answers, and I did nothing wrong. If I'm not attracted to a man's physical attributes, it's my decision to terminate the relationship.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2007):

I admire youe honesty, I have to admit I agree with you! It does look better and all men should have it done, so what if it hurts? think about women have to go through to look decent!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2007):

I dated a guy with an uncircumsized penis and he had asked me to go down on him and man it stunk so bad. It smelled like menstruation. How do you tell someone "jeez your smell is repulsive!"

I mean I didn't mind the skin so much but to be honest I guess I never felt really attracted to him. But it was a weird period in my life anyways. So he doesn't count.

Look I don't blame you for feeling repulsed. But I wouldn't tell him why you are breaking up with him cause it might hurt his feelings. I mean it's not his fault that he isn't circumsized.

I guess if you really wanted to HELP him maybe you should tell him and perhaps suggest he get circumsized. I mean if I was a guy, I would DEFINITELY get myself circumsized, even if I was an adult already. So maybe you can enlighten him. But don't tell him that's the reason you want to break up.

Good luck.

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A male reader, Samutsen Poland +, writes (17 December 2007):

Samutsen agony auntBy the way, circumcision has almost become a standart practice in the US and doctors advice it.It appears the whole US society is mutilated!!! see below:

Circumcision statistics are difficult to obtain because of the large number of locations in which circumcisions are performed in the United States. Different sources provide varying results. The time frame is also important because circumcision rates have varied from year to year.

History. Wirth (1980) published circumcision statistics obtained between July 1963 to December 1965 by the Cycle III of the Health Examination Service of the Department of Health, Education, and Welfare, a result of physical examinations of 12- to 17-year-old boys.1 The numbers relate to the incidence of circumcision in the late 1940s and early 1950s. The findings are set forth in Table I.

Table I

Census Region Northeast North Central South West

Whites 83% 89% 74% 74%

Blacks 68% 52% 31% 54%

Combined 81% 86% 63% 73%

Wirth reported that 76% of all boys in the survey were circumcised—whites, about 80% , and blacks about 45%. Wirth emphasized that, in some hospitals, more than 90 percent of boys were circumcised.1 Wirth's data are consistent with those reported by Laumann et al. below.

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A male reader, Samutsen Poland +, writes (17 December 2007):

Samutsen agony auntHey, I definitely respect your wish and I am completely with you. i think that there are still people out there with some common sense, who would understand a partners reasonable and legitimate wish is a wish to be respected.

As a circumsized man I think you should clearly tell him your wishes /which is not only esthetically but health wise correct.

It is like,no body can force me to be with a woman with tattoo.

hey, please do not get hurt from the comments of some people, they are liberals who respect the wishes of the posters (any type of fantasy, any dildo using, any combination or choice of sex.) but when it comes to anything nearing a religious belief (which in your case may or may not be the case ) they become sarcastic.

You have every right to tell him what you don't like in him and if you are repulsed by it dont be with him. Best wishes.

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A female reader, duskyrowe United Kingdom +, writes (17 December 2007):

duskyrowe agony auntWhy are you so surprised about the answers the others have given you? Have you ever thought of dating a guy who is Jewish as they are circumcised for religious reasons? Just a thought!!

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2007):

Don't tell him why Jenna, if you feel you really do have to break up with him. Even though it's all your issue he'll likely have an emotional scar that will leave him vulnerable and insecure about his member for life.

I guess it appears shallow to judge a fellow by his john thomas. To my mind, relationships should be built on the quality of the connection rather than mere physicality.

But it's your row to hoe - break up with him if you must, but find some other plausible reason to do so.

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A female reader, Jenna1980 United States +, writes (17 December 2007):

Jenna1980 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Well, I'm a little surprised and annoyed at the answers so far. I am not spoiled, nor petty. If you had said "sheltered" I would agree with you. In the US, around 90-95% of guys (real citizens only) are circumcised. In my limited exposure to a man's privates, I've never seen one, and I'm sorry (NOT), but an uncircumcised penis is very ugly, and looks like a doggy dick or something. I'm not going to appologize for being unattracted to it, that's not my fault. What if you were a breast man and dated a woman who stuffed her bra 2 wholes sizes fuller. The first time you saw her naked, you wouldn't be as attracted as you originally thought you were.

I'm going to break up with this guy before it becomes a relationship, and yes, if he asks, I'm going to tell him why.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2007):

watch sex and the city and the episode where the girls disscuss this

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2007):

Is this for real? I know circumcised 'neater' and looks better but if you really liked this guy would it matter? I don't think you really like him, maybe you could ask him to get circumicsed but you have to be together for a long while before you asked!

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A female reader, rockelle United States +, writes (17 December 2007):

rockelle agony auntAfter reading your post I had to laugh. I understand that you prefer a man who is circumsized if that is what you are used to, however I think that if you really like this guy that should not be grounds for you to break up with him. Maybe after sometime you will get used to it and your feelings will change. That was your first experience with him so your were probably surprised it will take some getting used to but as long as he is clean I do not see the problem. Think about it,before you break up with him if he is a nice guy you should give it a chance. If you do decide to break up with him then you should at least be honest about why.

You could tell him: "your a nice guy and I like you, but we have to break up because your penis makes me gagg..."

Good Luck.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2007):

I guess if you've always only been with men who have had their most precious asset mutilated, and you don't care for an un-mutilated one, it would be better for you to move on. It would be better for him too.

What do you mean 'get it fixed'? It's not broke, so why 'fix' it? I'll tell you something, with proper care it'll be a darned sight cleaner and less smelly than the average vagina! How would you like that cut to pieces?

My advice is to leave him - he could do better for himself.

Phil

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