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He ignores my calls and texts and makes excuses.

Tagged as: Cheating, Dating, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (20 September 2014) 6 Answers - (Newest, 21 September 2014)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Well, I've been in a relationship with my boyfriend for 4 months now, but before that we were dating on and off, and he keeps saying he'll never leave me, but he keeps going on about other girls and he knows I don't like that at all. I've asked him to stop talking about them so much, and he has tried, but now he's going to see them more and is inviting them round to his without me there. He also keeps lying to me about things, like saying he's made plans with one of his friends or that he has to go out with his family, but he just wants me to leave him alone - I've already told him that if he wants space then he just has to tell me. I'm a bit worried that something could be going on between him and some other girl, he seems to not want to see me as much and keeps ignoring my calls and texts., then when I question him about it he'll make up some excuse, like he was busy walking the dog or with him family. Any help please?

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A female reader, oldbag United Kingdom +, writes (21 September 2014):

oldbag agony auntWait for a few weeks to confirm what - why are you letting him rule you ?

Take control of your own life - do not 'wait' because it is over already.

Now is the time to accept it, get over him and MOVE ON, LET GO because he has.

It's not easy I know, but you will feel way better in the long run if you do not wait around love.

Get out there and grab life by the balls Xx

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (21 September 2014):

Well, thanks for all the answers, but last night he said we should go on a 'break', so I'm guessing this is the end. He won't speak to me at all, so I'll have to wait a few weeks to confirm it with him.

Thanks everyone.

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A female reader, oldbag United Kingdom +, writes (21 September 2014):

oldbag agony auntHe doesn't sound like your boyfriend.

He sounds like someone who is hoping that by ignoring your texts and calls - you will get the message its over.

Stop all communication, get your self dressed up and go out for a night with friends, you need to let go of this man emotionally and move on. Sounds like he is lining up his next girl already.

Have some fun and forget him.

Good luck

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A reader, anonymous, writes (21 September 2014):

You're the one who won't just give up and go. He just lies to you and lets you keep on complaining about it; because he knows there is no consequence for what he's doing.

What does he have that you can't give up? Is he a millionaire? Does he have the remote control to a bomb around your neck? What? You described a total assh*le!!!

He doesn't respect you, and lies to you. Ignores your calls and texts. He sneaks around on you, and invites girls over when you're not around. You won't leave? You think whining and complaining is going to stop him?

Well, when there is no consequence for hurting you, you are being an enabler. You are giving him permission to wipe his feet on you. Even though he's no prize. He's a piece of dirt, and you're saying you're not worthy of anything better than that. I'd let the other girls have the sorry sonofabitch!

Don't make idle threats or offer empty ultimatums. A guy who is a jerk will call your bluff; and hold you hostage to your own weakness. He's a piece of sh*t, but you won't give him up; because you don't want him to go to the other girls. Well, he's doing it anyway.

I think he has dumped you already.

Now what?

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A female reader, Ciar Canada + , writes (21 September 2014):

Ciar agony auntI'm afraid the relationship is over. Your boyfriend is pursuing other girls, or at least receptive to their pursuits. He doesn't want to be the bad guy by breaking up with you so he's hoping you'll clue in or get fed up and leave on your own.

I know that's not what you want to hear but there is no other explanation for his behavior and the longer you stick around, the more hurt you're going to be.

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A male reader, devont United Kingdom +, writes (21 September 2014):

devont agony auntWhy on earth are you putting up with this? He sounds like a dreadful boyfriend who is not interested in you or the relationship at all.

I would stop calling and texting him and if he doesn't contact you, just assume the relationship is over. If he does, then either end it with him or tell him to up his game or you will end it.

You're better than this and deserve to be treated much, much, better. He might be seeing someone else, he might not, either way his behaviour is very poor. End it and find someone that values you more.

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