A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:i have been married to my husband for 27 years. ever since we married he has the say in our marraige, i was married for ten years before we had our son he never helps me around the house he works hard and is a good provider. we have not had a phisycial realationship for 8 years as he took it upon himself that we all have our own bedrooms. it a case of what he says goes for many many years, i have tried tiredlessly to speak about the way he treats me but he puts up a deffence and i get no reply frome him. i am so very tierd that he says he will do this or that and he never dose anything to make things better when i try to conversate with him he says i am wathching tv ask me later so rude! help! Reply to this Question
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female
reader, MsVick  +, writes (5 November 2010):
 He has gotten away with this for 27 years, he probably figures why should things change now? After all you have allowed this bad behavior and he has in a way made you his slave. Of course he won't listen, he doesn't feel he has to.
He probably also feels that you won't do a thing about it, shock him put your foot down and tell him things change NOW or else.
Good luck
A
female
reader, LadyCorsair +, writes (4 November 2010):
 Do you really want to spend the rest of you life in a loveless relationship with no affection? Are you staying because you feel you have nowhere to go, or because you're hoping he'll change? Suggest couples counselling, and if he says no to that, say "Well, it's over for us then isn't it?" and walk away. Go stay with family or friends, and get yourself out of this horrible situation! Good luck
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A
female
reader, sammi star +, writes (4 November 2010):
 You've allowed him to get away with this behaviour for 27 years so it will be very difficult to get him to change now. Why have you put up with it for so long? If you genuinlly feel he can change then you need to MAKE him listen to you. If he doesn't listen then I doubt he even realises how bad you feel at the moment. Don't approach the subject when there are other distractions, turn off the tv or take him out somewhere and then have the discussion. You could give him the ultimatum that if things don't change then you won't stick around to put up with it but then you have to be prepared to keep to your word and walk away if his behaviour continues. Whatever you decide to do in the long term you must make him listen to you and understand how unhappy he's making you.
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A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael  +, writes (4 November 2010):
 He is rude and inconsiderate. You have a right to leave him if he does not start treating you like his wife instead of his slave. Tell him that.
I hope that helps.
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