A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I have just reconnected with an old friend i didnt know him for long before and we are getting to know each other better now. He is a very open guy . He asked me on a date but also 'warned' me hes got cancer again throat cancer this time , its the 3rd time in 7 years. He does look on the worst side of things i think he does it to prepare himself just incase . I know the last thing he wants is for me to sit telling him keep positive . Another friend had cancer about 8 years ago and with her i didnt treat her any different and she told me she liked that . I plan on doing the same with my friend just keeping the time positive without saying so , hes going through radiotherapy treatment right now so i dont know how hes looking / coping, i do worry im going to feel sorry for him ( which i do ) and hell see it . How can i avoid this if at all possible . Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (27 March 2017):
 Off course you are going to feel sorry for him, that is only natural. Just try and be yourself as much as you can. I don't really have much advice for you, only to remain strong and act how you would with anyone. Don't ignore the fact that he has cancer either. Talk to him about it and see how he is feeling.
A
male
reader, Denizen +, writes (16 March 2017):
 Don't avoid the subject. People with this hanging over them need to talk openly and you might just be the person he can talk to.
He is going to have down days. When that happens he won't want to feel alone. Being isolated with such a burden is very hard. So if you feel he wants to talk then do so. Be truthful. You shouldn't try to offer sugar coated responses. Look for the positives but don't pretend things are going well if they are not. He will know that better than you.
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