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He expects me to have sex with him because he thinks I'm not a virgin! What can I do?

Tagged as: Dating, Sex, Virginity<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (25 January 2007) 4 Answers - (Newest, 21 February 2007)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I've liked this boy in my tutor for a while now and i've just told him and he asked me out but he expects me to sleep with him because he thinks that i've lost my virginity when i haven't. i don't know what to do

:(

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A female reader, hails United Kingdom +, writes (21 February 2007):

hails agony auntif he liked you he wouldnt expect anything, he'd just be happy to be around you but you should tell him you're a virgin and take it from there.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (26 January 2007):

Any guy who wants to date you and expects 'sex' has the character of a low-down snake, hun. You'd be better telling him to hit the road, and hang onto that virginity for the right guy that loves and cherishes you, in your future. A man who is a good quality, decent guy would never, ever say that he expects you to sleep with him, dear. They're the ones you want to be dating. The ones that said what this guy just told you, are players and scummy, cheap womanizers, who never get serious about any women, in their lives.They treat women horridly and you will be setting yourself up for pain. Kick him to the curb and keep your self-respect intact. Go find a good guy to date.

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A female reader, cd206 United Kingdom +, writes (26 January 2007):

cd206 agony auntEven if you weren't a virgin you wouldn't have to have sex with him. Tell him to get lost. It's your body. You're neither old enough or ready enough to have sex yet. Trust yourself that when you're ready you'll know and never sleep with a guy just to keep together because that never works out in the long run. If however you decide to disregard all this advice can I insist the one part you take away from it is that safe sex is the ONLY type there is.

CD

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (26 January 2007):

First of all Id like to say that even if you weren't a virgin that doesn't mean you'd automatically HAVE TO have sex with him! Secondly it sounds like he JUST asked you out..am i right? So i wanna say its not always the best thing to have sex on the first date weather you're a virgin or not.By the sounds of your question you are not ready for sex but it also sounds like you are really interested in this guy.So this is what i personally would do:go on a date with him.. its okay to tell someone you don't have sex on the first date and that you'd rather wait to see how things go with him.That way you can put off telling him you're a virgin..but remember if you continue to see him you'll eventually have to come clean.If hes understanding to wait than that shows hes respectful and that you are a confident person to be able to say no..It shows self respect. And if you're considering seeing him for a while than its good to know that he cares about what you want. Why would you want to not only have sex with but lose your virginity to someone who doesn't otherwise respect you? If he gets upset about it than that goes to show he doesn't care about your values and is selfish for only caring about his own needs.Trust me, losing your virginity is a big thing and you'll always remember it, so why not do it for the first time with someone who really cares about you? I almost guarantee that if you have sex with this guy and you're not ready you will end up feeling used.It might be hard to say no to him but again,if you're not ready, in the end saying yes will make you feel worse than saying no. I really hope that this helped you out in some way and i also want to say that when are ready for sex PLEASE practice safe sex! Good luck Hun :-)

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