A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I hope someone can give me advice about this becuase I didn't sleep a wink last night for thinking about it.I was out with my boyfriend last night and we had a really good time, but something spoilt it - he sent me a text message which was for someone else who I don't know. It read "I'm bowling with a mate" - I'm not a mate I'm his girlfriend.We've been together now 6 months, and I don't understand why he would describe me as a mate. I thought maybe he didn't want that person to know either he was out with me or he didn't want that person to know he has a girlfriend.Since we've been together I've done alot for him and he has even said I've done more for him and treat him better than he could of thought than any of his ex's but it was like a kick in the stomach for me and I'm close to tears.Please help me, going out of my mind.
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has a girlfriend, his ex, text Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 July 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionTELLULAH, your right, I think everyone deserves a chance don't they - but this time I'm going to have my eyes wide open xx
A
female
reader, TELLULAH +, writes (24 July 2008):
 To be honset I think you should give him a chance and see what happens. I have tried to catch my B/F out loads of times when he has done something fishy, but he has always (except once) been telling the truth.
Just proceed with caution as they say. And if he seems like he's lying and making you feel bad, then push that man to the curb LOL.
XX Take care babe
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 July 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi TELLULAH, I understand what you mean, it might be habit putting a "x" which to be be honest I didn't think about but the thing that hurt me the most was the mate thing - I thought that I might give him a second chance and see what happens. What do you think?
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female
reader, TELLULAH +, writes (24 July 2008):
Hi,
Just wanted to say that guys do slip up sometimes, and they can be a little thoughtless. My B/F always puts X's on the end of text's even to his mates.
And guess what he said yesterday "I cant find my bank statements, they must be at your house" That statement would not have been so bad!!! except we have lived together for 3 years. When I got upset about it and asked why he said it, he replied " Do you have to read into everything I say, I just made a slip up".
He couldnt understand why that would hurt..... Men eh!!!
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 July 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi guillaume, last night he took me for a pub meal and was really nice to me, I thought that might of been a sign of a guilty mind but then he also said sorry for the text being sent to me. He said that I have to trust him but I find it hard to after that.xx
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 July 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks Curiousbynature, but the thing is the text was sent to me and it had a "x" on the end of it. His male friends all know about me and know me as his girlfriend, so who was he textin?
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female
reader, Curiousbynature  +, writes (23 July 2008):
Just chill out. Guys have to be cool with other guys. And if he thinks of you as a mate, but he is actuall your boyfriend then thats great! The middle core of a relationship is you enjoy the other persons company! Dont worry too much. Guys dont think when they text. Plus, if you keep checking his texts you are going to make yourself crazy. Just trust him and trust yourself that you are enough woman for him to handle!
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 July 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks TELLULAH for the advice but the thing is it did have a "x" on the end of it and it hurts, he said it was from another night but it was a coinsendt that we were bowling too - i feel like an idiot
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 July 2008): Yes babes it makes perfect sense... "I love him with all my heart but sometimes I wonder about him - does that make sense?... Cause you know what I know you love him and treat you good, I do worry about him though"
"I've done alot for him and he has even said I've done more for him and treat him better than he could of thought than any of his ex's"
What does he do for you, how does he make you feel special and loved? Bowling story sounds long and a little bit strange. I've got that nagging feeling as well?
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female
reader, TELLULAH +, writes (23 July 2008):
Mmm! Until you said that you spoke to him the next day I thought, oh just a stupid guy thing, and you are worried for nothing. Why did he lie the next day though, because it would show up on his phone that he did or didnt send it to you. He could have shown you his phone history, and you could have seen for yourself.
I dont think it was to another girl though, or it would have had an x on the end of the message, so I think you can relax there.
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 July 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the advice guillaume, like I said to the others it was a bit strange that we were bowling too but I'm going to take your advice as to the being on my guard with him and just watch out for the small things as that's the give away.
Thanks hun xx
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 July 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks Emilysanswers.
I have asked him this morning and he said that he never sent it to me, but it might be an old message cause he went bowling a few weeks ago (which he said he told me but I know is a lie) but I thought if that's the case then its a bit strange that it just happened to be while we were bowling too.
I want to believe him but I have this little voice in my head nagging at me telling me to be careful. I love him with all my heart but sometimes I wonder about him - does that make sense? xx
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female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (23 July 2008):
Perhaps he typed in "I'm with my gis... girlesfm....girlfrgms" then got bored of predictive text and typed in mate instead.
You just need to ask him, you really should have asked him straight after you got it. Does he know you got it? If not then why not walk over right now and say "haha, I just got a text from you from last night." and ask him why he called you his mate.
Good Luck!! xx
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female
reader, Paula4u +, writes (23 July 2008):
 I would feel worried to, ask him about it. Dont confront him just ask what you mean to him. Dont put words in his mouth and dont put him with his back in a corner. Let him answer it do it gently OK? Good luck I would feel worried too.
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