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Guys never hit on me and I think it's because I have a big nose. Should I get a nose job?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Dating, Health<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (20 August 2016) 10 Answers - (Newest, 24 August 2016)
A female United States age 26-29, anonymous writes:

I never/barely get hit on by men. I see other women get hit on men frequently, but men do not frequently hit on me. Only homeless men or guys I don't find attractive will call me beautiful out of nowhere. Once in a blue moon, I will catch a guy staring at me but a guy has never approached me or asked me out and I do not think it is because I am intimidating. But I cannot remember the last time a guy hit on me.

I think my nose is big and I feel like it is getting in the way of my attractiveness. I feel really insecure about it. I look in the mirror and I am not satisfied. People told me when I was younger, that I had a big nose (even though I was chubby at the time.); I have my father's nose. Now, my nose is not as big as it was when I was younger but I still don't like it.

Should I get a nose job?

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A female reader, Thatgirllol United States +, writes (24 August 2016):

Thatgirllol agony auntI think you should only do it if YOU want to it doesn't matter what everyone else thinks. You'll find the perfect guy for you and if a guy really likes you they can get over your 'big nose'

I think what's on the inside matters not the outside.

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A female reader, mishi 1 United States +, writes (22 August 2016):

mishi 1 agony auntHi there ,

I had same experience as you . I had bump on my nose and did not look in my face. I never had any accident but it looked like I had accident .

but , it was naturally and my noise was big too. ( just for your information my sister had big noise as well with no bump)

So , we both had nose job. We never regret for our decision . Now, It look very pretty in our faces.

So , my advice is you have to do nose job if you are in shape , social , but still guys and your self don't find you attractive.

Now , after nose job I breath well.

I talked with surgeon about breathing issue so he did two surgeries ( nose job and breathing issue)Same time.

I never ever regrets for my decision

Note , Still you are not going to be attractive after nose job if you are not in shape and social .

Please , be aware when choosing and surgeon .since , few folks that I know have bad experiences . ( so choosing a qualify surgeon is very important)

Best Mishi

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (21 August 2016):

I am a guy so I don't know how much my experience apply to you. I was in similar position when I was in my late teens. I was having difficulty in getting girlfriends and I blamed the size of my nose for my failure so in desperation I oneday visited the family doctor and asked him if I could have an opertion for my nose.

Obviously he convinced me that my nose ok and he said something which I still remember.

He said I wish I was as goodlooking as you.

Needless to say I didnt have the operation and now looking back I realise my problem was not my nose but what shallow and boring guy I was then.

Now I am not saying you dont need a nose operation. Maybe you do. Watch a film called tamara drewe. very interesting.

Actually nose opertions are one of the easiest operations if you need to have one but make sure first you need one.

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A female reader, RubyBirtle United Kingdom +, writes (21 August 2016):

Well, here's a slightly different view

25 years ago - I was you. Guys were never interested in me and I had a massive conk.

I went down the plastic surgery route and I have never regretted it. I now have a nose that fits my face.

Guys still don't hit on me very often, though - they never have. But the surgery gave me the confidence to hit on them.....

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (20 August 2016):

Honeypie agony auntIt's not your nose that is getting in the way of you meeting a guy.

It's you.

You a think that because men YOU want to hit on you don't, it must be your nose. It must be YOU there is something "wrong" with.

Only thing I can see "wrong" here is that you perhaps go for a type of men who are superficial when it comes to women's looks.

A homeless guy who calls you beautiful does it with NO ulterior motive, he calls it like he sees it. So in that sense, that is a VERY nice compliment to get. Even if it doesn't lead to a friendship, partner etc. It's at least an honest compliment.

Plastic surgery may not be the first option you should consider.

Have you tried to go to Sephora or Max and have your make up done professionally? Ask them to minimize your nose JUST to see how you CAN look. (if your nose is what you don't like about your face). I'm NOT good with make up, AT ALL.. mascara and eyeliner is my limit. Nothing else. But I have had my make up done 2 for weddings by a professional and it was SUCH a great chance to see how different I can really look. I am OK with my face, so I don't feel the need to change anything with make up or surgery. I have great bones and eye, my mouth and nose are meeh.. but a GOOD eye make up make people notice my eyes - So maybe that is also a consideration - to make SOMETHING else in your face be the "focal" point.

I'd try other things FIRST, then if it doesn't work for you.. TALK to your doctor. LEARN the risks. Weigh it against the pro's. Talk to your mom, sister, friends.

I have a childhood friend who had a nose job, but... it was ONLY because she broke her nose and ended up with a deviated septum, that made her nose run constantly and irritate her breathing and sleeping.

Her nose WAS more straight after, not smaller. But it started to work as "intended" again.

It's YOUR body, YOUR nose. I just wouldn't go straight for the surgery. Self-love, self acceptance and maybe... a readjustment in the TYPE of guy you "think" you want.

Don't forget, you got your nose from your dad, which got it from somewhere else in your family and YOU might pass it on to a son or daughter. Who then don't understand why THEY have a "big" nose etc... so would you want your own kid to get surgery too? Or would you want her to LOVE herself, warts, big nose and all?

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A male reader, Been there Now over it United States +, writes (20 August 2016):

Before getting nose surgery, try some free and relatively inexpensive tricks such as smiling, being upbeat, dressing stylishly(shoes are always important in these matters), keeping your hair nice and so on. Together, these items are probably worth many times what a good nose is worth. I don't really remember guy friends complaining about someone's nose. Your nose and your facial expression are always observed together. A smile and being upbeat and enthusiastic are probably the most important things of all.

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A male reader, Been there Now over it United States +, writes (20 August 2016):

Before getting nose surgery, try some free and relatively inexpensive tricks such as smiling, being upbeat, dressing stylishly(shoes are always important in these matters), keeping your hair nice and so on. Together, these items are probably worth many times what a good nose is worth. I don't really remember guy friends complaining about someone's nose. Your nose and your facial expression are always observed together. A smile and being upbeat and enthusiastic are probably the most important things of all.

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A male reader, Been there Now over it United States +, writes (20 August 2016):

Before getting nose surgery, try some free tricks.

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A female reader, Andie's Thoughts United Kingdom +, writes (20 August 2016):

Andie's Thoughts agony aunt"guys I don't find attractive will call me beautiful out of nowhere" says it all. There are good guys who compliment you, but you aren't interested in them, so you don't value it. It works both ways, OP.

What has not being chubby got to do with your nose?

No, you shouldn't get *surgery* to improve how you *think* others see you. What do you offer guys, aside from your appearance? What's stopping you from asking guys out? You won't get what you don't go for. Can you afford plastic surgery? You can get it, if you want, but the money could be spent bettering your future - there are less drastic ways to improve how you feel about yourself. Trying therapy before surgery would probably benefit you.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (20 August 2016):

I doubt it has anything to do with your nose, it is probably because you're not smiling much.

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