New here? Register in under one minute   Already a member? Login244945 questions, 1084256 answers  

  DearCupid.ORG relationship advice
  Got a relationship, dating, love or sex question? Ask for help!Search
 New Questions Answers . Most Discussed Viewed . Unanswered . Followups . Forums . Top agony aunts . About Us .  Articles  . Sitemap

Girlfriend of 6 years cheated on me with my best friend!

Tagged as: Cheating, Friends, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (21 May 2010) 2 Answers - (Newest, 21 May 2010)
A male United States age 36-40, anonymous writes:

So about 6 weeks ago I got a letter from an old buddy/no longer but its a love letter/appologie from my ex best friend. This. Letter went on to say thing like how sad he was cause his life was falling apart and things like that and how he wished she didn't kick him out of our life ( I though we did for using h). But then went on to say he would giver her her pantys back and would give her the recordings on his phone to her or let her watch him delete them and how he was so in love with her.

Me and this kid have been freinds for 9 years and me and her have been together for six I was there for him when his girl cheated on him gave hime food and help him out when he needed and then the last year of our relationship she said she got to lonly and he was there and pushed the issue with her and she finally said yes the two people I trusted the most in the world. I was trying to figure out. A way to tell her I wanted to get married and have kids.

I'm really hurt iv seen and talked/talk to her but it kinda rocky its hard to be around her without thinking of how she lied to me about every thing and denied it till I gave her the letterand how she slep hit him she says she is so so sorry she calls me crying still every time I see her she cries it makes me hurt so bad I loved and still do love this women but I have trust issues any ways (the reason I left me fam for her) I saw my self spending the rest of my life together. But now am heart broken and dontt know what to do the only thing tht really helps at all is smoking pot cause it makes me happy and forget about it.

Iv never really been an emotional person but since this has happend I'm hit with a parade of emotions iv never felt before and don't know how to handle it But sorry my question I feel like I really really want to go back to her I love her. But if she can't make her self happy how can she make someone else happy. Thanks and sorry for the book I'm just lost in life allmost

View related questions: best friend, cheated on me, my ex

<-- Rate this Question

Reply to this Question


Share

Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question!

A female reader, anonymous, writes (21 May 2010):

i am really sorry that you are in this tormented frame of mind currently. in time it will get better.

you may want to be with this woman but she lied and lied and lied ,didn't she. only until you showed her the letter did she know she was busted. only when she saw the evidence of the proof did she admit her lies (?) . why do you want to spend your life with this woman who cared nothing about your hurt, she lied repeatedly. now she cries because she is busted. it is in situations like this, no matter how hard it is, when I would like to say good riddance to bad rubbish. this woman and your ex best friend both do not deserve you. they both betrayed you, please do not be fooled by her crocodile tears. she is just not worth the effort anymore.

self destruction is not the answer so smoking pot has to stop. getting high will not erase her cheating. at least you were not married to her. can you somehow see the bright side? yes you love her so mourn the loss of your relationship, then slowly move on. you cannot trust her ever again and she has proven so untrustworthy that you will be a fool to believe anything from her rotten lips. both these people who you trusted have betrayed you so i think the first thing is getting rid of them from your life. it means making small life changing decisions. it means making tough decisions. it means making decisions where you will have some peace and closure to all this cheating.

as hard as it is try to stay away from her. she may manipulate you with her tears and her false words. they mean nothing to her.

it is a tough road ahead but there is a road. a road for you to travel ALONE, while you sort your life out.

all is not doom and gloom, there is light at the end of the tunnel. you just need to believe in yourself and know that you are better off without these two people in your life.

good luck and take care

<-- Rate this answer

A female reader, BunnyTee United States +, writes (21 May 2010):

BunnyTee agony auntWell, like I always say: No good deed goes unpunished.

I don't think you're lost, you're only in a dark place you don't wish to be, right now. You, my friend have suffered some serious betrayal and the proverbial knife in the back.

Let me also get out of the way: you can 420 yourself to death but the same facts will still be staring you straight in the face when you come back down. Practicing temporary escapism does nothing for the issues you now face. How you choose to spend your recreation time, is outside the scope of the point, I believe. So, 'nuff said there.

You're wasting your time and effort in tormenting yourself over things like how can she make someone else happy? This serves no purpose. She probably can't,anyway. Look how she's treated you.

You're better off just going on with your life. There's no cure for betrayal. That's all it will ever be. Only time heals those injuries.

If you want more of the same, go back to her. If you don't, leave her to the cesspool she's created.

Look after you. You can work at trying to forgive this, but you won't soon forget it. Give yourself some time to get over this and heal. There's not a lot of material left to do anything very constructive in this matter. Your best bet is to leave it all behind and move on with your life as best you can. Best of luck and let us know how well you're doing in this!

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

Add your answer to the question "Girlfriend of 6 years cheated on me with my best friend!"

Already have an account? Login first
Don't have an account? Register in under one minute and get your own agony aunt column - recommended!

All Content Copyright (C) DearCupid.ORG 2004-2008 - we actively monitor for copyright theft

0.031267399999706!