A
male
age
36-40,
*ohnnyboy817
writes:My girlfriend that I have been with for about 2 years has recently started masturbating before we have sex. I find it completely odd. This is how it usually plays out... I start doing stuff with her and getting "fresh" haha but after we start getting in the mood she asks if she can masturbate first and get herself off. Then I pretty much end up waiting there for her to finish. I know what you're going to say. Whey don't you do it for her or why don't you just tell her no? I have done both but she ends up just wanting to do it herself again and if i say no then she gets upset. So what do you think I should do? Should I just let her continue to do this and be bothered by it? Because I have mentioned that it bothers me and nothing has changed. Or is there something else that I need to say or something that needs to be done to stop this because I feel that I should be the one getting her off. I don't mind having sex and she touches herself at the same time (that is completely different) I dont know. Im kind of lost. Thanks for reading!
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female
reader, aunty_rach  +, writes (10 February 2009):
maybe she finds it hard to get wet, maybe you are not doing enough foreplay with her? women are not like men, we don't just suddenly get turned on that quick.
A
male
reader, johnnyboy817 +, writes (10 February 2009):
johnnyboy817 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks a lot for all the replies! I really do appreciate it. It is pretty hot and everything when we are in the moment and she does it randomly but lately she has just been doing it right off the bat. But I will take all your replies and put them to good use. Thanks again!
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (10 February 2009):
You say you have brought this up before and nothing has changed but since you are happy to have sex with her after she is done, she may not think you are seriously upset.
So you may have to show her. Next time you start and she starts doing that, tell her you want to do it for her. If she says no then just tell her to give you a shout when she is done, and go off and play on x-box or make a cup of tea, or put the TV on. If she asks where you are going then just say that you feel like she doesn't need you or enjoy what you do so you may as well be off.
She may be under the impression that all men enjoy watching or something.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
female
reader, kellyxxx +, writes (10 February 2009):
 i would talk to her about this and tell her how you feel. no offence, butshe may do it quicker or better than you. just ask her the reason why she likes doing it herself, alot of womens magazines tell women to masturbate infront of there partner as this can be a turn on, she may have heard this and think that you love it! put her straight but approach the subject carefully, tell her that you want to see what you can improve on in bed and then ask her why she does this. xx
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