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Forced into giving him anal sex!

Tagged as: Dating, Sex, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (11 March 2010) 9 Answers - (Newest, 4 April 2010)
A female United Kingdom age 18-21, *abygirl021 writes:

My boyfriend always goes on about anal, and well i dont like it and he knows that, i gave him it to shut him up now he always goes on about it and makes me go on a guilt trip so he can get it, please help i dont know what to do xx

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (4 April 2010):

Are you lot kidding, or what ?

*abygirl021, you should never feel pressured into anything, albeit sexually or life in general. The key to a successful relationship of any kind is communication, through this we learn about each others likes and dislikes and learn to respect one anothers needs.

Tell him next time he puts you on a guilt trip that you are not comfortable with anal sex, tell him that you don't want to do it. The worst thing he can do is get shitty about it, if he does, then you need to understand that he is being selfish, any type of sex is about sharing and enjoying each other, not about you having to do things you don't like.

All the Best.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (15 March 2010):

This is not rape, nor is it love... I'd buy a nice 12" dildo, some lube and tell him that you have a game to play- "hide the dildo" should be loads of fun... get some photos and dump him the next day...

This guy sounds like a REAL LOOSER...

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A male reader, ulick Italy +, writes (13 March 2010):

ulick agony auntif you said yes for whatever reason then you said YES. If you don't like it don't do it. If it becomes a problem that you cannot overcome then dump him. If he is your age he just watches to much porn and things that is how to have sex.

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A female reader, Not My Name Australia +, writes (12 March 2010):

Not My Name agony auntIf you 'gave him it to shut him up' you have still given it/ consented - even if begrudgingly, so NO this is not rape.

What you need to learn to do is simply say NO to anything that you don't want to do, and stick to it no matter how much whinging he does.

Personally if it was me and I did not want to do that, I would tell him he could go right ahead, ..right after I shoved a big dildo up his arse and jiggled it about. I suspect the thought of it in reciprocal would soon shut him up, ..and if it didn't he would be history.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (12 March 2010):

First of all this is NOT rape, I'm surprised and indignant that people would advice you that it is, clearly undermining people that have been exposed to real rape.

This is nothing more sinister than a young man wanting to try something new, sexually, and finding ways for persuading his girlfriend to do so.

Quite frankly it is horrible that people are so keen to through around SERIOUS accusations such as rape first chance they get. In a court of law it would never hold up and on grounds such as these the accuser might even get reprimanded.

That said you shouldn't put up with this type of behaviour from your boyfriend. Next time he asks for anal tell him that anal is off the table until he takes a dildo up his back end... fairs fair.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (12 March 2010):

Sweetness this is rape. He has forced you in a way into a sexual act without your consent. It does not matter how he forced you as long as it has resulted in a sexual penetrative act without your consent. What you have to do is to dump this jerk NOW and speak to your mother or some adult about it, and report him to the police. These people are dangerous and someone must put them where they belong. Do it quickly while it can still be medically proven. This guy must be stopped and prosecuted. Behind bars he may have a lot of time to enjoy anal sex.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (11 March 2010):

He's using you, he doesn't love you, I don't care what he says...boys his age will say anything including I love you to have sex with you.

You teach people how to treat you. You gave in when you didn't want to. Now you have created a monster, get rid of him, monsters do not belong under the bed or in the bed. They just need to go away.

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A male reader, The Realist Canada +, writes (11 March 2010):

The Realist agony auntIt looks like you are going to have to plainly tell him that this isn't going to be regular occurence. Giving in will hurt your relationship far more in the long run then if he learns to accept this now.

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A male reader, Kenj United Kingdom +, writes (11 March 2010):

Kenj agony auntYou should never give in to shut someone up. Only engage in this if its what you want.

Sorry but if hes forcing you to do things you dont want then your being used. If he truly loved you he wouldnt be doing that.

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