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Fiance having sex with other guys won't admit it!

Tagged as: Gay relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (31 December 2008) 4 Answers - (Newest, 18 January 2009)
A female United States age 30-35, *ilmama1125 writes:

What do I do if I know my fiance is having sex with other guys but he won't admit it to me???

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A male reader, cherie38 United Kingdom +, writes (18 January 2009):

Plain and simple! If he won't admit it and you have conclusive proof then get rid of him! x

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A male reader, vtrob77 United States +, writes (31 December 2008):

Well I guess first off you have to decide what your objective is in getting him to admit it. How well do you know him? Is he gay? Bisexual? Just exploring? I'd also ask him how he defines cheating... like it or not many guys define cheating as "emotional infidelity" as opposed to "physical infidelity"; it could be especially difficult if he's newly exploring his sexuality.

I would not approach as "hey you're cheating on me"; I would ask him what he wants in life? Are you two going in the same direction? And most importantly regardless of how the relationship ends up the two of you need to be able to have an open, honest conversation.

and the best piece of advice I can offer: Don't ask "why", ask "how" questions... "why" causes people to become defensive in conversations, where as "how" questions generally get people to think about things.

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A female reader, lilmama1125 United States +, writes (31 December 2008):

lilmama1125 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

What make it worse is that I'm having his baby....so what do I do then??? I haven't caught him in the act I've just seen emails and how he's got a picture of his thing on like 3 websites....he swears up and down that he's never cheated on me!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (31 December 2008):

eh one if your fiance is having sex with other people then your better off without them! and two if you know it for a fact and they're lying its pretty clear you are lucky u found this out before you got married!! u deserve better then that!

but just make sure you have your facts right before you do anything

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