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Feelings for other women

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Question - (19 January 2010) 2 Answers - (Newest, 2 February 2010)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I am currently 21 and have for years now had feelings for other women. These feelings have recently become a lot stronger and focus on one women.I dream about this women and have fantasise about us becoming an item. However i dont know her feelings or if she even has feelings for other women. Should i try to take this further or should i try and forget and move on. The women is about 9 years older than i am and we have a lot of interests in common.

Any advice would be recieved with thanks.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2010):

From my experience you should be straight forward, deepening the relationship will not make a women fall in love with you. She will only love you as a friend. I know I can tell you from experience you have two choices. The first one is tell her how you feel, but there will be risk involved she may withdraw from your friendship, but if she doesn't it means she loves you as a FRIEND. the next is to give her up completely and just be satisfied with here friendship. but my advice is to tell her how you feel and know there is a chance you will loose her.

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A female reader, LaPointe Canada +, writes (20 January 2010):

I would pursue it the same way I would pursue any relationship. Think about it, if you were straight how would you be sure the guy you're going after is straight? You don't sit down at a bar and be like "Hey, do you like women?" to a man. So just let the relationship grow as it is, maybe you could talk to her about your feelings for her and see if she is interested in trying a relationship or dating with you or just staying friends, just like with anybody.

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