A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Ok, here's my problem. My girlfriend and I started dating back in November of 2011, and we were great. She was always happy around me, any time we had together she seemed to love, and always wanted to spend more time always told me she missed me. But back in March of this year, we moved in together. And now things are practically at a complete halt. She no longer says she loves me, she refuses to go out and do anything that involves me. She won't go on walks, doesn't want to go to the movies, don't want to go out to eat. But every once in a while a friend of hers will come by and then she will go out. I'm not sure if I've done something wrong, I've always been there for her, and I've TRIED to talk to her about this. But she says "I don't know whats wrong with me, I just feel numb like I have no emotions." Should I just leave this girl, or try to be around far less? I don't know what to do.
View related questions:
moved in Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 August 2012): Well I think fatherly advice may have a huge point. A few years ago a boyfriend she had stabbed her 4 times and hospitalized her. So now she can't get a job because she is on dissability. So maybe having someone living with her and frustrated because her only help with the bills is an SSI check? I don't know, but I'm going to give it time and give her some space and see how things do in the near future. I'm about to start college so I won't be around as often so maybe she'll beging to open up more if she feels less pressured. Thankyou all for your insight, I highly appreciate it.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 August 2012): to be perfectlly honest i know how she feels and my boyfriend was not as understanding as you he simply got angry at me and that made it worse, however he did show me how much i love him by giving me space and showing me how much i value him , so simply give her space or even go away for a trip alone without her as they say "distance makes the heart grow stronger :)
...............................
A
female
reader, Stayc63088 +, writes (21 August 2012):
 I agree with fatherly advice. It sounds like depression. It isn't normal to move in together then suddenly become numb to any emotions. I suffer from depression from time to time and that's exactly how it feels- numb and not wanting to do anything, every so often I can drag myself out of bed but for the most part I want to do nothing at all. Ask her if she's ever felt this way before or dealt with depression before and try to get her to see a counselor. Don't leave her alone more frequently. If you don't want to deal with it then I guess you could just leave her, if you love her you can be there for her and try to get her help. It's up to you.
...............................
A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice + ♥, writes (21 August 2012):
 This relationship is way too young for this problem. I believe there is something more. Her statement that she just feels numb is a strong indicator of a health issue. She may be depressed.
The #1 thing that you don't do with depressed people is be around them less. Be with her more. Make her go on walks and be around people as much as she can. Start with very short outings. Go to the grocery and buy ice cream. Walk to the mail box and back. Sunlight helps.
Get her to visit a doctor or a counselor.
Relationships do tend to slow down a bit when you move in. That is always a possibility but for the reasons I cited, I think there is more to it in your case.
FA
...............................
A
male
reader, Xearo  +, writes (21 August 2012):
Leave her, it will only get worse from here.
...............................
|
