A
female
age
51-59,
*hozin67
writes:I was with my bf for a year and a half he betrayed my trust decieved me emotionally abusive when he got injured I moved in with him and found reciepts he was at the motel repeatly with some woman he told me his cousin was livin with him come to find out his s0 called cousin is his exgf so I wrote him a goodbye letter and gave him back his keys so now he has the nerve to be angry with me and denies it he got caught why won't he tell me the truth? He says I abandoned him but why is he so upset? I loved him he said he loved me but won't talk to me and won't apoligige he says his conscions is clear but I'm devasted help any advice I just want to know why?why won't he come clean
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broke up, cousin, emotionally abusive, his ex, moved in Reply to this Question
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female
reader, sammy1986  +, writes (14 August 2011):
he may possibly try to win you back but what i would do is ignore his calls texts or any other way he tries to contact you cut contact all together
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 August 2011): He can't say anything to annoy you if he can't reach you. Block his phone numbers and email addresses. If he had a key to your place change the locks.
Act as though he doesn't exist and ask your friends not to talk to you about him. Do your grieving in private.
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A
female
reader, chozin67 +, writes (14 August 2011):
chozin67 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank u my friends says he will keep callin to try to win me back what do yall think?it is over I'm never going back to him he has the nerve to say I owe him for payin my cell bill that's wat he called for I'm not paying him any advice
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 August 2011): He won't come clean because he is not a stand up guy and he thinks he has nothing to gain by doing so. He thinks you abandoned him because all he cares about is himself. His behaviour is narcissistic. What he thinks, how he feels or whether or not he comes clean and apologizes doesn't matter because he doesn't matter. He was a bad boyfriend and now he's an EX boyfriend.What does matter is knowing you can rely on yourself to do what you need to do for your own well being. Breaking up with him was a step in the right direction. Severing all ties and having no further contact with him would be even better. If he's injured and needs tending, he can call his 'cousin'.He's doing you a favour not talking to you. There is nothing he can say that will make any difference.
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A
female
reader, sammy1986 +, writes (13 August 2011):
he will probably not tell you the truth because he knows if he did you wouldnt speak to him again i would forget all about him hes not worth the hassle the trust will of gone now if you got back with him you would be worrying about him cheating on you and become paranoid in case he does it again you deserve better than that
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 August 2011): He probably won't come clean because he knows you're weak when it comes to him and will go back to him anyway. Then he'll pretend he never did it and that you're overly sensitive and paranoid type. It's what abusers do to turn the tables and keep you down.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 August 2011): He won't admit it because he is an asshole. It's that simple. His motto is deny, deny, since he is an immature loser that doesn't want to be held accountable for his actions. You need to stop thinking about the "why" and the "how" and simply look at what he has DONE. Explanations don't matter. What matters is that he cheated multiple times and that you could have gotten an STD from his whoring around. Move on and stop thinking about the "why"
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A
female
reader, margaret z  +, writes (13 August 2011):
hello , i think your man is reacting like that to turn the table and prove to you that he didn't cheat since he's been lying all the time he must be ashamed and playing the innocent trying to get out of it with a clean image. that's how i see it. so now if you chase him you'll lose your cards and he'll win . try to walk away and give it some time . see what he's gonna do. PS: deep inside he knows he's wrong but he's showing the opposite. so don't torture yourself
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A
female
reader, iloveblue +, writes (13 August 2011):
 Cheaters will never ever admit to cheating even when you have caught them in bed with their lover. But since the evidence is strong and his lies are now undeniable, I'd say, you did the right thing by saying goodbye to him. Remember, you never deserved such disrespect like this and so the best revenge is to dump him and never ever look back. Never mind that he is upset, he is angry that you just caught him. Cheaters are the most defensive people on earth.
Do not waste time with this guy again. He did not value you as his girlfriend and did not even bother to think the times you stood by him when he needed you and cared for him when he met an accident.
I know how you feel and please learn from the mistakes of people who tried to listen to their exes and in the long run had been victimized again by their lies and promises. He does not deserve your love at all.
Best of luck to you.
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A
female
reader, VSAddict +, writes (13 August 2011):
 Move on from this guy. He's a jerk and he got what he deserved. He has no right to be mad at you when he's the one that disrespected you. I don't think you should look for an explanation. You both aren't going to agree on this so let it be and move on from this with someone else.
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