A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes:Hello,well it's been a while, since, I posted anything,it's been about three years now, an I still think about my ex, it only lasted three months, I thought it was great. I treated her like an angle, her ex before me, use to beat her, treated her really bad, she was in treatment for it, we never argued, just romance, but the day he got out of jail, she went right back to him, my question is, do you girls, think she ever, thinks about slow dancing in the rain, holding hands, taking walks in the parks, romantic poems, picnic, at Bridges of Madison county, Omaha zoo, going out dancing, every thing was so romantic, I just wanted her to know and feel, how a woman is suppose to be treated, from a man's heart.I've been with other women, but I don't have love to give, I still miss her, thanks.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2015): You have not met the right girl yet OP.
The one to light a fire under you.
Oh but you will.
And then this woman will really be history.
Never cry over somebody who left you. For a criminal of all people. She did not love you. That should help you let her go.
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (26 March 2015):
 I totally agree with SVC, and, although we are in the realm of surmises so any guess is good, FWIW I also disagree with the other poster about the fact that your ex is missing you and thinking of you.
Obviously that poor lady had a warped and dysfunctional idea of what love should be and feel like- " love " means different things to different people, and unluckily, what she can recognize and accept as " love " is what she got from her ex ( whose place holder you were while he was in jail ): abuse, mistreatment, beatings. I am sure she calls this " having our ups and downs like all couples do ", or " him having a temper " or even " being very passionate ", anyway the point is that her life experience and mental schemes signal to her like "for real " love what's actually the contrary of love. Music and romance and the Bridges of Madison County and what-have-you probably feel to her like a band-aid, a temporary distraction, a change of pace, but, basically, all stupid cheesy fluff in lack of the ( for her ) real, STRONG, adrenalinic emotions she gets out of her volatile relationship.
Regardless ( because these are just guesses and we won't be able to know the truth ) , SVC is very right in stating that you should worry very much about yourself, and not about what SHE might be feeling or thinking about the past.
It only lasted 3 months, it was over 3 years ago, you thought it was heaven.. and she obviously did not ,since she was so quick to give it up, which means you did not have a clear impassionate evaluation of the situation, as you probably don't have it now = you are clinging to a dear fantasy, and this may be detrimental to you if it prevents you from moving on with your life and finding new objects of love and new sources of emotional gratification.
Do not get stuck in the past, OP. Some people will say yes she thinks of you, other will say no he does not, but the real issue is : who cares what she thinks ? she is gone. But you, BE HERE NOW.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (26 March 2015):
 OP I totally disagree with the suggestion to reach out to your former gf. I think that will be very detrimental for your healing.
if you dated her 3 years ago for 3 months and you are not over her yet, then my concern is that you are obsessing over this woman and preventing yourself from moving on.
Whether or not she misses you or thinks of you does not matter to your daily life. Why is it such a concern to you?
It's very thoughtful and considerate of you to worry about how she is but she's long gone from your life.
I will tell you that I'm 55 and I still think about my boyfriends now and then... but the feelings are just memories and not any sort of longing or missing of them.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2015): Sure she still thinks about you. Probably every day. The thing with women who are in abusive relationships is that these abusive men often have a psychological control over their girlfriends/wives. So the girl actually fears him and what he might do to her and the people she loves if she doesn't obey him. When he got out of jail she might have felt like she had no other choice but to get back together with him. I don't know how long he was locked up but it probably wasn't long enough for her to fully recover from the damage he caused her. So he was released in time for her to still be vulnerable to his control over her. I am sure every time she is crying and feeling miserable because he hit her and abused her again, she thinks of you and how much better off she would be. You should reach out to her to see how she is. I bet she would be happy to hear from you.
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