A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am concerned about my husbands feelings towards miss perfect? Dan and I had been married about 3 months when we were invited to his freinds wedding reception, as soon as we walked in i noticed a gorgeous girl i immediately felt inferior. Then i notice Dan watching her, whether she was at the bar or near the dancefloor he couldn't take his eyes off her. I was livid but also very upset. I told him to stop it and he got angry saying he didnt know what i was talking about. The final straw was when she walked past him and they both looked at each other, they didn't smile but it was one of those 'i like what i see' looks. Well i told him i wanted to go home and i got really upset in the car. Up until this point Dan had always made me feel like i was perfect and i never ever noticed him looking at anyone else. Thats why it was such a shock, okay she was gorgeous but he was so blatant about it.Its bugged me ever since.. now hes anounced we are going to this freinds birthday party - i immediately felt sick and said 'well if that girls is going i am not' to which he said 'shes not' so i questioned him, 'how do you know shes not going?' 'have you asked about her', or worse still have you asked her yourself.. my mind is on overdrive - he so called doesnt know this girl but he certainly knows if she is going to the party or not - help!Am i being immature, overreacting?? If this girl is there i don't know how i will feel, my husband says we both have to go. Would you be inclined to think there was something going on behind my back?? Or is he simply being a bloke?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 May 2008): I would be pissed off too. I wonder how he does know that miss perfect isn't going? I assume he asked his friend because he either wanted to see her or he wanted to know because he knew you'd be mad if she were there & in that case he either A. wouldn't ask you to go with him, or B. wouldn't go all together. However, it is hard to know since I am not him. Him blatantly staring at her, then denying it would really piss me off. As soon as I noticed him staring at her, I'd have made a scene. I'd try embarassing him somehow. I wouldn't stand back & watch him drool for a period of time before I said anything. Sorry but his behavior is not acceptable.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 May 2008): Not overreacting or being immature, but it is a flag your relationship needs work.
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A
male
reader, rproctor  +, writes (8 May 2008):
I would think you are over reacting... Looking at someone attractive is an innate behavior... Its like saying dont look at the black hole... You cant help but do it, and when you do it sucks you in! However, your husband should know to be a bit more conspicuous about it, and not to over-draw the stare. There is a difference between starring and gawking... If he is gawking at another woman then smack him in the back of the head, or better yet do something to embarrass him, that should stop it!
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