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Does my girlfriend's recent behaviour betray a guilty conscience?

Tagged as: Cheating, Gay relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (20 October 2014) 2 Answers - (Newest, 21 October 2014)
A female United States age 36-40, anonymous writes:

Am hoping to get some advice about my relationship. There is a saying that cheaters often give themselves away if you listen to them.

Well, my girlfriend went to talking the other night and randomly said I love you. Nothing strange about saying I love you but it came at a time when we haven't talked much this past weekend. And when I did went to call her she sent a text before I called saying she was speaking with her father. When she said I love you, I asked her why. And then she said because you are you. It almost felt as though she was comparing me to someone else and she decided im much more different than they.

Then on top of that she goes on to say how she has learned her lesson about relationships and she knows karma comes around. She continued to talk about relationships, fidelity, infidelity and I just kept listening.

Another issue is I left a card at her home, for her to open and read so she can have when she misses me. Well she haven't really been texting me she misses me, and she haven't even open my card that I gave her four days ago. But she says she loves me and misses me. How is it that you miss me when u haven't even read my card?

She kept giving me subliminal messages about how someone has no idea about this or that. I asked her what she mean and she started talking about her dad and stuff. What it feels like is someone is hitting on her and she is flattered that she is found attractive and said in the past she was just living like she was invincible when it came to others giving her attention. That was saying to me someone is giving you attention now but you think you are doing the right thing.

She and I have been together for four years. We do not live together. I do trust her to some degree, but I listen intently and she made my intuition feel some type of way. Not necessarily she cheating but something is up. Please give me advice.

View related questions: I love you, infidelity, text

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (21 October 2014):

I agree with previous poster.COMMUNICATE!! It is the cornerstone of any and every good relationship.

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A female reader, MSA United States +, writes (20 October 2014):

MSA agony auntThe problem is you analyze too much! Relax!

If you're wondering why she didn't open your card.. ask her! When you ask her why she says 'I Love You', and she tells you why, accept the answer! and why are you even asking her why she says 'I Love You'?? Can't it be cuz she just wants to??

The most viral thing in a relationship is over thinking and over analyzing. Healthiest is just to ask questions and talk about anything that bothers you. Maybe someone else in her life is going through similar issues and that's why she's been talking about it? Does every thing that enters her mind or comes out of her mouth have to be related to you??

You've been together for four years... that's not a short time, please treasure this relationship by not over thinking and analyzing too much. Just talk to her.

Best of luck!

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