A
female
age
30-35,
*agek
writes:Hello everyone, I am not quite sure how to interpret whats happening here.My boyfriend and I are in longdistance relationship right now(due to college). There is this event happening,big companies' directors, and CEO,.. are meeting with our alumni, and as you can imagine its by invitation, so one of my friends who graduated last year had a ticket and he asked me if i wanted to go to that event, honestly speaking i was really happy my friend asked me,because its a great opportunity,that many students like myself would love to have,the connections,the contacts,etc, but obviously i had to check with my boyfriend first,to see where he stands.I texted him,he asked me why we couldnt go in a group,i explained to him that it was by invitation,and explained to him whats the event going to be like,then he said "babe,you can go,i trust you,and the way it looks,you can make great connection at that event for the future",i texted him back and thanked him for being understanding. We talked that evening but just regular conversation nothing special. The next day he texts me asking me" by the way yesterday you didnt answer me,and i know you might not have the answer but why did that guy choose you,why didnt he invite someone else?",i texted back and told him that he invited me like a friend, and as far as i know and was concerned,they was no other particular reason. He then texted me again asking me if he has a girlfriend or not. and i replied back and said " no he doesnt" then we stopped talking about that.Now my question here is "why is he asking me all those questions now?" .I know this is a delicate situation and thats why i asked him before i could make any decision,because obviously i have to be considerate towards him,and if it was just something like a concert or a birthday party then i wouldn't have even asked i would have said " No to the guy",but this is an opportunity to build up my future,and my friend has never tried anything with me, and we will be with other people, i will be trying to make connections for internship,my future career,etc, not standing with him throughout the party. Now i am really confused. Is this what guys do?You don't clearly say what you think?For example, me i have already told him,that hanging out with girls i dont mind at all,but taking pictures of girls sitting on his lap thats i am not comfortable with that.So if he was not comfortable,why did he give me the whole i trust you speech,you can go?I imagine everything that he can be thinking about it,ooh the guy invited her,maybe he likes her,he can try to make a move,etc ,but that is where the trust comes in and that is where we communicate,that is why i went to him with this situation in the first place.I know that he has feelings and maybe he might think my friend has ulterior motives,but why cant he talk to me about it and be straight forward?I am not upset or anything like that,i am just wondering if thats how men act?The event is tomorrow night,and i am going. Now People,whats happening here?Give me your opinions please.Thank you
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, sagek +, writes (15 April 2012):
sagek is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHello,thanks for your answer.He is my friend not my co-worker,i am going there to get myself some connections for my future,its beneficial to me,and i dont like that guy like that,he is just a friend.Thanks for your input!
A
male
reader, Jmtmj  +, writes (15 April 2012):
 Because if he is straightforward then he can be accused of limiting your career opportunities... regardless of whether that limits the opportunities of your co-worker to get into your head/pants.
P.S. Your friend probably has ulterior motives.
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