A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Before I used masturbate like once or twice day. Sometimes with porn, sometimes without. However, after losing my virginity a few weeks ago, I have had no desire to masturbate, or sexual desire whatsoever. For example, I check out girls, and it does nothing for me anymore. I try to think of sexual thoughts, hard time to get an erection. Whereas before, I could check out an attractive woman in public and pop an erection like nothing. I don't mean to offend other girls, but I am giving an example of the ease in which I used to achieve an erection. I am kind of scared.
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (14 July 2015):
 so you lost your virginity a few weeks ago with a woman. Is she a special girl? or was it just a way to dip your wick so to speak?
IF she was a special girl you care deeply about and you can't get rock hard and have per-ejaculate with other girls, then maybe the key is that you really care for this girl that you had sex with and shouldn't be catting around with OTHER girls?
if you lost it with just anyone just to lose it, then perhaps you are having residual guilt that sex is not for fun and rather for a deep intimate relationship and you seek that now.
more details always help us figure out what's really going on.
A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (14 July 2015):
 I think it happens to other people too, including women. One factor that increases libido is curiosity. Once that's satisfied you don't hanker after it so much. You want to know what sex feels like, so you are trying to create the real thing by masturbation.
It's not scary. Maybe for men, you think your libido is your manhood. At least for now you are not obsessed with sex anymore, and it can be a good thing. A lot of people make mistakes in life, get with the wrong people or get pregnant, because of this craze in obtaining sex.
I assume the girl you lost your virginity is your girlfriend. When you know you have a regular supply of sex you are relaxed. A high libido helps single people work hard to find mates. You don't need to anymore. If you are in love with your girlfriend it stops attraction to other girls. It helps you to stay monogamous I guess. I mean you still find other people attractive. You don't become blind when you are in relationships. You just don't get boners all the time, only in the mornings in bed.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 July 2015): Thanks for the reply. I understand your point, but that's not what I am having issues with. What you outlined is always a work in progress (always working on personality). Porn and masturbation are out of the equation, as there has not been that much desire to. It's when I try to have sex with other women, I don't get aroused like I used to, or I have a hard time getting a "lubricated erection", or a concrete brick erection like I used to get all the time. Sorry for the visuals.
It could that I am in fact sexually satisfied. But considering how horny I would get pre-sex life, the amount of times I would masturbate, I find that very hard to believe.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 July 2015): You do reach a point of true sexual-satisfaction. You're not turned on 24/7. If you've been going at it constantly, you'll lose interest in sex for a while. Now it's time to concentrate on showing feelings and emotions towards young women; and not just seeing them as sex-objects. Don't worry, it's only temporary.
I do recommend you leave porn out of the equation for a while. It can desensitize to some degree; if you're masturbating to it too often. Just forget about sex, and focus on how you feel about girls other than just having sex with them. Work on your personality and charm; while your willie gets a rest.
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