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Does it make sense to be scared to and wish to at the same time?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (14 November 2007) 4 Answers - (Newest, 15 November 2007)
A female United States age 26-29, anonymous writes:


I am a 15 year old girl and i have lately been very curious about having sex. I know that there are consequences, i guess that it's just been bothering me on exactly what it feels like and such. A lot of my friends at school are beginning to have sex and they tell me stories but it still doesn't help me. Almost all of my school has had sex...did drugs...or have done alcohol; and they kind of make it seem like all of that is "cool to do". I'm not going to do drugs or start drinking that's for sure. And i'm not one for doing something just because someone else is...this is different, i just suppose i'm curious and wonder if it's wrong to be scared to but also want to. If that makes sense...

Can you help?

View related questions: drugs

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A reader, anonymous, writes (15 November 2007):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

thank you all who helped me!!!

it was all good advice...i'll keep you all posted.

and i totally agree with all of you.

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A female reader, sexi South Africa +, writes (15 November 2007):

sexi agony auntHi

You should want to have sex b/c everyone else id doing it. That is the wrong reason for having sex. You should do it with someone that you love and are in a stable relationshiop with. If you do it for the wrong reasons you would end up regretting the experience. You should only do it when you are ready and have no doubts. You should do it with someone that is speacial to you b/c that is a memory that would be with you forever.

Regards,mail me if you wanna talk

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (15 November 2007):

Have you ever kissed & hugged & made out with a guy? Have you ever hugged a guy and had a whole lot of bare skin between the two of you?

Have you ever put anything penis-like into your vagina when you were aroused and then rubbed it in and out?

Well, that's the mechanics of the thing.

The emotional consequences are more complex. But those are only gonna be anything good if you're doing this at the right time with the right person. Otherwise you'll just get the physical side of sex if you do it now (and also probably a bunch of negative feelings afterwards for having cheapened your first time.)

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (14 November 2007):

Nope. Perfectly natural feeling.

Just, if you do "do it" make sure its with someone you actually give two shits about the first time. Cause once its lost, virginity won't come back.

Now it's illegal cause you're underage, but that hasn't exactly stopped anyone in high-schools in any day and age, but you need to be aware that you'll be breaking the law.

Also, don't have to high expectations for the first time... its hardly ever like you see in films. In fact sex in films is almost nothing like in real life...

But if you are trully ready, then make sure you use plenty of contraception and that you do 'it' on your own terms and not on those of some git trying to get into your pants.

But no, its perfectly fine to be apprehensive and curious and excited about it at the same time. Blessed as we are by our large brains and self-awareness we can feel multiple things at once.

Hope this helps.

Flynn 24

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