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Does her telling me to move on really mean its over?

Tagged as: Breaking up, Dating, Friends, The ex-factor, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (21 June 2017) 9 Answers - (Newest, 29 June 2017)
A male United Kingdom age , *ecent man writes:

Hello i was in a relationship with a woman for 17 months , she ended it because we argued, quite a bit , as she wanted to settle down,and i did , but not yet , she said at begining of april ,can,t say goodbye , so i,ll say goodnight, that was the last time i saw her But since then i,ve send odd text, but no reply, she will not talk . but she has asked her friend if i have been in touch ,out of courosity i think,as i need her friend as a point of contact .In april she told me not to text anymore , so i didn,t . Now her friend has told me she is seeing another man , and she has told me via friend to Move on and find someone else , but i think there is still something between us . I,ve read Women say one thing and mean another.Does move really mean it is over, i am heartbroken . Thank you

View related questions: move on, heartbroken, move on, text

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland +, writes (29 June 2017):

aunt honesty agony auntNo you need to open your eyes and realize that she has moved on. I am sorry that you are heart broken but when you had her you wanted to wait until you both became serious, you wanted different things so she went to protect herself. Wise woman. Let her go.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (22 June 2017):

No means No. (What is wrong with you? if a woman says No she means it!)

She's gone and there must have been a reason she left you and doesn't want you back. Maybe you thought that her No meant Yes and her Yes meant No. Maybe it's you who doesn't really want her back even though you say you do... You see???

How absurd!

Goodbye

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (22 June 2017):

I know how you feel its been a year an a half for me an I still miss her,why I don't know she treated me bad an I treated her like she was a princess, in a new relationship but my heart still feels the pain some times it takes years to get over them, an they never miss you a bit,men an women can be cold hearted, good luck

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A female reader, mystiquek United States + , writes (22 June 2017):

mystiquek agony auntSorry OP, but most ladies do not say one thing and mean another. Yes there are people that play games but I don't think this is the case. It would be best if you accept that things are over. Cut all contact and let her go. Don't embarrass yourself by chasing after someone that doesn't want you.

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A male reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (21 June 2017):

olderthandirt agony auntSorry about the heartbreak dude but when it comes to she wants you to move on..She's not kidding. Go forth and find a better one.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (21 June 2017):

Honeypie agony auntGood grief OP...

Women don't say one thing and mean another.. I don't know where you read that kind of crap... Some men's magazine?

That is like saying no really means yes with women, NO NO NO.

OK?

Block her number and MOVE on. IT IS over. She has found someone else whom she thinks is a better fit for her.

You still have feelings for her which mean you are holding out for hope and that is painful when realizing that there is no hope there.

I think the reason she has asked about you is that she didn't/doesn't want to hurt you but she IS over you. And now it's time for YOU to get over her.

Block and delete her number so you don't feel tempted to call/text and STOP asking that mutual friend about her. There is no point in that other than putting salt in your own wounds.

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A female reader, CindyCares Italy +, writes (21 June 2017):

CindyCares agony aunt No, most women do NOT say one thing and mean another. Particularly in your age range, by which they have stopped playing silly games if they ever did before.

Of course , some do ( play games ). Those are women , though, who are manipulative,immature, unreliable- are you sure that you'd want a woman like that ? Are you sure that you 'd want to be with a woman that says one thing and mean the opposite ?... How would you trust her, when she tells you " I love you " or " I would never cheat on you "?

My point is... it was for the best.

While I believe she wants you to move on, because what she said is backed up by her action of starting dating another guy- well, in case this was all a ploy to get your attention or mess with your head... would you want a partner like this ? Seriously ??

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A reader, anonymous, writes (21 June 2017):

She said "good night," which has the same negative-undertones and sarcastic-sting as "get lost!" She was being passive-aggressive about it, but she's no longer interested.

Dear sir, if you argued a lot, and you were not on the same page about where the relationship is going; she has made a final decision.

She didn't say goodbye; because she knows she'll be seeing you if you have mutual-friends and get about in the same circles. Her good-night was a final one.

She is dating someone else and ignoring you. Move on.

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A male reader, N91 United Kingdom +, writes (21 June 2017):

N91 agony auntYes, it's over.

What about 'she's seeing another man' makes you think there's still something there? She said not to contact her, is that someone who wants to be chased?

You had your chance and messed her around by not wanting to commit to her. She has found someone that does, leave her alone to be happy and move on.

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