A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I hooked up with this guy i have been meaning to hook up with months agoSo i went to his place and things were going on but midway just before the intercourse i stopped and asked him to stop and just left quicklyI haven't heard from him yet.Is he not wanting it anymore ? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (14 September 2016):
 Ah so you did explain him what happened and why- and he was not that interested ? Just " OK " ? Uhm- then yes, I guess he belongs to the first 50% I was mentioning before ; he wants " satisfaction guaranteed or his money back ". Yes, do stop asking him to hook up again. He has not got the patience and the generosity to make it an enjoyable experience for you too- so he does not DESERVE to live this experience with you.
I am a bit surprised you'd be so gung-ho about hooking up again and finishing what you started. I mean, if sex started being painful, and penetration difficult, and it was NOT your first time... this most probably means you were not lubricated and aroused enough. And if you weren't lubricated and aroused enough, either he does something " wrong " technically without bothering to find out if things are going Ok for you, ( not enough forepley, comes to mind ) - or he / the situation itself makes you nervous and defensive.
Then... leave it be ! A hook up is not the kind of thing where you need to give yourself a pep talk and bravely soldier on ; for what ? It's all about sheer pleasure, if it is unpleasant to begin with, it defies the purpose. There will be other occasions and other guys .
A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (14 September 2016):
 I'm with the aunties and the uncle here...
I bet you HE is baffled a to WTF went down. Did you explain why you stopped and left? Does he know? If not, maybe YOU need to call him and let him know.
If he does maybe he just feel like it's not going to work.
And maybe you need to consider that "hooking up" and casual sex isn't for you?
...............................
A
female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (14 September 2016):
It sounds that the one not wanting it anymore was you. He must be baffled !
Why did you stop him mid action, and why did you run away ? And if you had your reasons , as I am sure you do ( a bout of performance anxiety ?... you felt suddenly unwell ?... you did not want to go all the way the first time ?... ) why did you not text him / email him the day after " I am sorry I left that way, the reason was... " ?
Now, we don't know the guy- and it was just a hook up anyway, so yes, 50 % he may have thought " Too much trouble too much drama . Whatever. Next ! ". But the other 50%, he was totally taken aback by your reaction, and he thought he must have done something wrong, or worse : that you found him physically repulsive - and obviously he would not be in a big hurry to contact you.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 September 2016): I started feeling painful as he was penetrating then he made a joke and asked "is this your first time" i felt judged and physically there was no way for penetration. I also messaged him clarifying what went wrong, he just said ok. Do i just stop asking him to hook up again ?
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 September 2016): I started feeling painful as he was penetrating then he made a joke and asked "is this your first time" i felt judged and physically there was no way for penetration. I also messaged him clarifying what went wrong, he just said ok. Do i just stop asking him to hook up again ?
...............................
A
female
reader, llifton +, writes (14 September 2016):
 That's a very vague question. I'm confused. Why did you stop him? Were you not wanting to sleep with him? Were you having doubts? What caused you to stop him and leave in such a rush? Those details matter.
If I were in his shoes, I'd probably back way the hell off also, thinking I had done something wrong or that the girl was a bit odd, to be completely honest.
More details here may be required.
...............................
A
male
reader, N91  +, writes (14 September 2016):
 Doubtful,
He was probably wondering what the hell just happened and thought he did something wrong for you to leave In such a hurry.
...............................
|
