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Does he not love me like I love him?

Tagged as: Dating, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (16 March 2017) 4 Answers - (Newest, 28 March 2017)
A female United States age 13-15, anonymous writes:

Dear Cupid, I have a bf that I have had a crush on ever since 2016 then we started dating 2017 of February 9th. I love him more than I have ever loved anyone else in my lifetime. Anyways he texts me constantly and I do to, but when i say i gtg love u babe, he barely responds to saying i love u too he either says same or okay bye. Idk what to think, is he scared of saying I love u alot more again because of ex;s or does he not really love me as much as I do? Please help me out

View related questions: crush, text

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland + , writes (28 March 2017):

aunt honesty agony auntHe is a teenage boy and he is not going to be as lovey dovey as you. Girls love words and declarations off love, but guys at that age are just not in to the whole emotional thing. You are very young so slow things down and just enjoy his company.

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A female reader, Andie's Thoughts United Kingdom + , writes (16 March 2017):

Andie's Thoughts agony auntOP, this isn't love, this is a crush. You had a crush on him for a while, but it doesn't turn into love a month after calling each other boyfriend/girlfriend. At your age, it means like a lot, not love - especially for boys. Young teenagers confessing love are actually just infatuated because that's their emotional capacity romantically. Boys feel it even less.

What you feel is closer to obsession than love, except it's not a bad thing (yet). Stop saying it for a while, let things develop slowly. He may not have had a crush on you for as long as you've liked him, so it's new to him. Boys don't feel things like girls do, so they aren't as infatuated with girls as girls are with boys.

Girls are raised to believe love is perfect and instant, but it isn't. It doesn't happen in your teens, except maybe 18 onwards. We aren't fully mature until our mid-20s and boys even later. Slow things down and step back - it's not healthy to invest so much so soon.

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A male reader, WiseOwlE United States + , writes (16 March 2017):

Sweetheart, 13-15 year-old boys don't really know what love is.

They're just kids, and they aren't as serious about things as girls your age. They either like you, or they don't. They feel texting and hanging-out with you should be enough to let you know.

At your age, if a boy says he loves you; he really has no idea what he's talking about. He'll just say it because you want him to; but he's not old enough for his feelings to run that deep for a girl. That doesn't mean he doesn't like you a lot, or more than other girls.

You shouldn't be so intense. You can tell how much he cares about you by the amount of time he spends with you, and how nice he is to you.

Slow it down, or you'll scare him away. You're a little bit too serious for your age. Wait until you're older to expect guys to tell you they love you, and really mean it.

Here's something to remember in the future. If he doesn't show it with his actions, the word means nothing.

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A male reader, Fatherly Advice United States + , writes (16 March 2017):

Fatherly Advice agony auntBased solely on your age, he just isn't used to expressing that emotion in that way.

Be careful, you are in over your head.

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