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Does he just tolerate my shape due to the emotional connection? Is it wrong of me to want a man who loves all of me including my body shape?

Tagged as: Dating, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (31 October 2015) 3 Answers - (Newest, 31 October 2015)
A female United States age 36-40, anonymous writes:

I've been in a Relationship with a man for a year and a half and very happy . The time we have spent together has been wonderful . However recently he has had an issue with my weight and is treating me differently because of it. He seems extremely attracted to thin woman and I think his attraction to me is DESPITE my weight . I'm not hugely I obese but I am chubby. I actually like my body shape and don't feel the need to lose weight as im healthy and happy

Is it wrong of me to want a man who loves all of me including my body shape and weight and not someone who just tolerates my weight because of his emotional connection to me

View related questions: lose weight

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A female reader, BloggerChick United Kingdom +, writes (31 October 2015):

BloggerChick agony auntThere is absolutely nothing wrong with wanting somebody who loves ALL of you. That's what everybody wants right? He shouldn't be tolerating your weight just for the emotional connection, if there is a true connection then nothing else should matter. He shouldn't be making you feel uncomfortable or self conscious or anything like that. You said you're happy with your body shape, and that should be all that matters.

My advice is, have a talk with him. Tell him you're happy with your body and that you don't like him treating you differently because of it. Also, you shouldn't be with a man who only appreciate and love all of you, at least in my opinion you shouldn't. If he loves you he won't be expecting you to change.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (31 October 2015):

If he's treating you differently because of your weight then maybe loose weight. If you love him and want to stay with him.

Honestly you should ask him if he still wants to be with you because you like your size and don't plan on loosing weight.

If your happy with your weight and don't want to change for this guy then don't. Dump him and find a guy who likes bigger women.

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A female reader, supermum United Kingdom +, writes (31 October 2015):

supermum agony auntNo you aren't wrong honey. You deserve someone who loves every bit of you. Is there a particular reason you feel your weight is such a turn-off to him?

At the end of the day a relationship should make you both happy. If neither of you are happy then perhaps the best thing to do is walk away. However, since you have been together that long you should try talking to him about it. Tell him how he has made you feel, and tell him that you deserve someone who loves you as a whole. There might be another explanation as to why he is acting out?

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